Hate me or Love me...

Rants...

2011-10-01T15:06:00.001+08:00

After last night I realized...

We are both no longer the same person we use to know...

Thinkings change as people grow...

I changed.. So I shouldn't be surprised that you changed too..

Seeing you holding on to another's hands and waist...

Honestly, just made me feel weird..

Probably was the closeness that we use to have for so long..

And the picture which i would have to face one day surfaced last night..

Caught me unprepared..

Maybe it's because I haven't fully got over it yet even though it was my choice...

But I have never regretted making that step...

Haiz...

D e c I s I o n s

2011-09-28T02:55:00.001+08:00

Should I or should I not....

Richness or Poverty..

Which would u choose?

Being rich would mean having to swallow my dignity and may never be happy..

Staying in poverty would mean having to crack my brains every now and then to think of ways to solve the problems..

If u were me.. Which would u choose?

Happy happy

2011-09-25T04:02:00.001+08:00

So glad to see him after 3 months...

Can finally spend some time alone..

Though timing is short n I smell like BBQ

But he delivered his promise to bring me to eat wat I wanted..

It's not e best.. But for time tgt.. It's still worth it..

:)))

Too happy to slp right now..

:)))))

I am back.....Hopefully

2011-08-03T01:44:00.000+08:00

Everythings gone...

Gave up my boyfriend

Gave up my job..

Lost in life...

In a life hell full of debts..

I miss someone like seriously..

But i guess i was just a toy to him..

Fell for the wrong person and giving up the right one..

I'm just a bitch..

Had a boyfriend who loved me whole heartedly..

But i fooled around after the break up..

I'm a butterfly..

As what he said..

We are just not meant to be...

I had no regrets though...

Only thing is..

I'm wrong to hurt him like that..

And i'm remourseful..

Just hope he could think and turn for the better..

There's no turning back right now..

And i have no intention to turn back..

At least anytime soon..

As for the bunch of jerks....

As they are labeled as..

Are just to kill my time...

They are just nothing..

Probably the few that showed "care and concern"

Whether just faking or are real..

Could continue to be friends..

The rest..

Seriously..

Fuck off...

Going for a few interview tomorrow..

Hopefully i can start afresh and get out of this shit soon...

I've got sleeping company tommorrow.. :)

Hopefully nothing will happen between us..

He's the exact clone of me..

Same mindset..

Same shit life we went through..

But he's more cheerful..

Unlike me..

Negative Minded...

Hopefully he could enlighten me and brighten my life a little..

Shall move on to update my online business now.... :)

Which i hope could pick up...

penna was here

First and Second day of work

2011-03-22T16:55:00.001+08:00

First Day: Reached at 7.34am.... but HR was late for work.... I waited hell 1hr for her.... didn't want to take a cab at first but I didn't want to be late so spent $8.30 on cab... Good thing lunch was cheap... Paid only $1 because of the subsidy of $1.30 from the company... pathetic though... Only one stall is available... The most economical and cheapest.., mixed veg rice... who cares la... E food is alright PLUS it's freaking cheap lar! In the office I felt so overdressed.... The rest even the sup are all in jeans.. Like WTF... Listen to her teaching me till my eyes nearly closed.... Omg.....Second Day:Raining day... Argh! Thought of wearing jeans but didn't want to be in the wrong dress code so I dug out my black old jeans(about to be sent to the welfare hm or something) and wore that....Hell... I left yMy house only around 7.30... 133 came so I thought maybe I could just hope inboard and off to work... Reached the correct bus stop.. Followed the correct people... I thought.. Till I followed them up the bus125... Bloody hell it's the wrong direction... Argh! Alighted at Aljunied and have to walk back in.... Halfway saw this bus stop.., 125 again... This time correct bus stop but I alighted too early.. Walk again and was late... Half an hour late.. Like WTF... finally gt my pass.. Stupid HR as slow as ever... Good thing the security saw me and told me... End up.. Because of the rain I gave up gg outside for lunch. Gd also.. My lunch only cost me $1.10... :) Countdown 26 mins to 5.18... Then off I go back hm.. :)

new phase of life

2011-03-18T17:40:00.001+08:00

Today marks a new beginning... A breakup...And a new job coming on the way...I don't know if I'm happy or sad...All I know is my heart was both aching and jumping at e same time...Could be both a relief and a heartache I suppose,..Relief cause I could carry on without liability ...Heartache cause it's my longest relationship till now...2 years 9 months and 8 days....I hope he could get up on his feet and live his life to e fullest... And e same for myself too....

2009-09-15T22:38:00.001+08:00

I'm sick of life...

Life sucks to the max..

nothing seems to be going right..

why are the rich getting richer and why are the poor getting poorer?

I wan more jobs..

I don't mind lesser time to rest..

i want more money.

haix...

2009-07-08T21:10:00.002+08:00

I need a life!!
I need another job!!!
I need SOLUTIONS!!!! ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2009-06-12T22:20:00.002+08:00

I am so so so tired of EVERYTHING...

The world's smallest girl...
Don't know if she's the smallest..
But she is one of the smallest...

Kenadie Jourdin Bromley..
Really Thumbelina..

View..... her website... http://littlekenadie.com/main.php

One of the brothers in my school...
Little Chevie (2years old) and his brother Chester (4 years old)
I've been bringing Chevie down from his class from the first day i started work.
Cause his mum always comes earlier than the rest and also..
His class is on the 2nd floor..
Cute little boy...
Who says his mum is 7 years old.. :)

2009-05-27T19:51:00.001+08:00

I NEED A GOOD REST~~~

2009-05-14T21:32:00.002+08:00

Working was...Zz...
Haven't got the time to blog lately..
One reason..
Too lazy to wait for the stupid laptop to load..
Freaking Lllllaaaagggg...
Took unpaid sick leave today..
Yes..
I'm Sick..
Haix..
BORING!

First year anniversary coming up...
Am out of ideas for gift..
Suggestions anyone?
Best if it's handmade stuff..
But have to hurry..
I'm left with like...
3 weeks?
Argh....

2009-04-26T15:14:00.005+08:00

Work was Zz...
I have to say...
But who says work is always fun..
It's fun looking at the kids..
But no fun when i looked at what i would be and have to do in the office...
There were many foreign students in the centre itself..
And i must really say...
They are all freaking cute..
Nice features they have..
What to say..
They are childrens' of Expats in Singapore..
I came across this Japanese boy on my second day of work...
Was supposed to pick out a boy whose mum is here to pick him..
But when i opened the door..
I saw the whole lot of them crying..
Practically everyone...
The parents of the Japanese boy were in tears..
Even the Dad..
It happens that it is his last in school and their last in Singapore
And they are schedules to go back to Japan the nest day..
Saddening..
The boy himself was crying...
Seems like he could understand what was going on and he might never see his friends again..
Though he's only in Nursery 1...
For a moment i felt like crying..
But i didn't want to add on the already "tearful situation"..
Picked out the boy and off i go...
~~~~~
Yesterday was erm...
Can't find a word to describe it..
Saturday..
Enrichment classes....
Something unexpected cropped up..
I have to take over a class for an hour cause the teacher would be late..
EXCUSE ME?!
I'm only an admin assistant..
Not a teacher...
Is that within what i am suppose to do..
Or rather am i paid to do that?
Another teacher heard what the senior asked me to do and what she said was..
"She's very fake...."
Yea..
Kinda true..
I believe the workload wouldn't be so heavy if she could increase her speed in doing things..
Just to generate an invoice and receipt would not need 20minutes..
You are not me..
I'm new..You're not..
And it didn't help when i caught her dozing off a couple of times while teaching me stuff..
I mean..
Hello..
Imagine...
You're done with the collection of money..
And filled up the form..
The envelope is supposed to be placed into a file first before the despatch arrives..
And she could just doze off..
RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME?!
With her hands still on the envelope
And the envelope halfway into the slot????
PRO SIA!
How did she do that...
Zz...
I don ask for much..
Just please don confuse me further.....
~~~~~~~~~
Some out dated pictures....

on the cab on his way back to camp...

With my minnie mouse from east coast...
The meal we cook one afternoon...The prawn...My chicken...And the full meal....

2009-04-20T18:47:00.004+08:00

Watched.....
The Fast and The Furious 4 on Saturday..
Not bad..
Though i'm not a fan of cars..
Like my idiot boy..
Went DBL O after the movie to accompany HW...
Somehow the group is a little messed up...
Most were drunk...
Including my boy..(He should be wanting to say he wasn't drunk,just high)
Yea right...
Had one of....
Think i haven't been drinking it for way too long...
Puked at before i could finish the 2nd shot...
Think one was enough for me..
Wasted money..
Am starting work on Wednesday..
Like FINALLY..
Was looking forward to it..
But now having a little jitter..
Haven't been to a new environment for a long time
And it doesn't help that all the while i worked at places, the hours were irregular..
This is like permanent???
I'd be at Orchard branch for training..
For around a week before i'm due to go down to Thomson for good..
Sian AH!!!!!
:P

heppy?

2009-04-13T19:31:00.002+08:00

I'VE GOT A JOB!!!!
LIKE
FINALLY!!!!!
:)

Thanks lovie for the introduction...
Heehee...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Temper being triggered off very easily lately...
Don't know what's wrong with me...
Too stressed perhaps...
Anyone got lobang for part time..
I seriously in need of money....
Zz....

I wait..I wait..I wait wait wait...

2009-04-06T20:06:00.003+08:00

Wait till i going crazy...
Zz...
WHY THEY HAVEN'T CALL ME!!??
WHY?
WHY??
WHY???
ARGH~~~~~
Call me lar~~
I need a job lar~~
ARGH...
Maybe i should consider doing some business...
Anyone interested in getting kinky stuff for the room???
(For 1-to-1 use in the room... hee hee~)
Or maybe should take up the suggestion ah..
Sell my used underwear..
OOPS~

2009-04-01T21:36:00.003+08:00

I WANT A JOB!!!!
This is like the donkeyth time i'm saying this..
I fucking need a job...
Argh....
My Horoscope today says....
If it feels like the whole world is against you or that nothing can go right (sibeh the true ah!!!), take a deep breath and look to the future. (like it helps...i'll try out anyway...and do i see a future?!) You are having a phase of trouble(even the papers knows this) that cannot last much longer. (not cannot last much longer. Is it lasted far too long already)

Randoms...
What does my Birthday Month say about me..
I'm born in January...
And it's pretty true...
Stubborn and hard-hearted. Ambitious and serious. Loves to teach and be taught. Always looking at people's flaws and weaknesses. Likes to criticize. Hardworking and productive. Smart, neat and organized. Sensitive and has deep thoughts. Knows how to make others happy. Quiet unless excited or tensed. Rather reserved. Highly attentive. Resistant to illnesses but prone to colds. Romantic but has difficulties expressing love. Loves children. Loyal. Has great social abilities yet easily jealous. Very Stubborn and money cautious.

2009-03-26T01:30:00.002+08:00

I was late for work this morning...
Damnit...
But not too bad since i did open another memo..
At least i had something to stuff into my manager's mouth..
Hey...I DID work ya know...
Did some calculations...
Zz..
I have better find job REAL soon before i have to declare bankrupt..
Though i already am...
Zz...
Not by the government though..
By myself..
A stressful time i had these few months..
Stress in finding a job..
Stressed monetarily...
Stressed emotionally...
Stressed about everything..
So much that i wanted to sacrifice my relationship in bid to release myself a little..
Stupid...Yes i know i am...
I was never smart in the first place...
Tiffs..Tiffs..and more tiffs going on..
Communication breakdown i suppose is the problem..
The root?
We are not opening up...
Our bad tempers...
And plus...
My very very temperamental..unpredictable mood swings..
And that includes PMS anyway...
Shall see if i could wake up before him for his..
Not so surprising surprise...
Something which he asked for..
But not too sure if i could wake up before he do..
Job hunting wise..
Having one this friday...
Some customer service stuff..
Retail hours..
Zz.....
Too bad i don't have the $$$
If not i confirm continue my studies...
Though i suck at that.....
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Something out of topic...
I CURSE that fellow who passed the FREAKING VIRUS to my dad..
Does that guy use his dicks to think instead of his brains..
Thanks ah...
Thanks to your coughing..
p/s: I'm not saying coughing is wrong...
Can u PLEASE cover your BLARDY MOUTH WHEN U COUGH?!
My old bean is like 65 this year..
No longer as strong as we are...
U IDIOT DON'T KNOW HOW TO THINK AH...
NOW PASS TO MY DAD...
BLARDY HELL DON'T LET ME FIND OUT WHO THIS IDIOT IS..
OR I FREAKING HELL MAKE SURE HE COUGH UNTIL BLOOD COME OUT....

A day of regrets..(nearly...22nd march 2009)

2009-03-23T19:45:00.002+08:00

Nearly went back to singlehood the other day...
Blame it on myself..
I can't take stress...
At least what i had was too much for me...
That night was the day that i nearly lost someone i loved a lot..
And nearly lost someone whom placed me in an important spot in his life..
And i nearly lost him for good..

But i'm glad it's all over now...
Back to the happier time when i can make fun of him like anything..
Thank you darling..
But one thing..
Pls tell your ex-girlfriend..
If she wants you back..
Stand out and come to me..
Don't go to your friend and try to ask him to help...(Though he doesn't want to)
Don't have to worry about me hitting her...
I don't fight anyway..
And even if i do..
I might not win...
Anyway..
Tell her to grow up...
If you want to go..
I won't tie you to me...
Come..
Take me on........
I'll be waiting..

2009-03-20T20:00:00.001+08:00

Ok...I don't feel good..
I didn't screw up my interviews this time..
In fact i was placed on the top priority of being hired..
But i lost the position to some dumb ass..
Better don't let me find out who the person is..
Scully happens to be someone i know.. :X
Argh..
I seriously need a job..
FAST..
It doesn't help when this is like about time when everyone starts graduating and it gets even harder...
Argh...
Aww...
My head...
PAin....
Grrrr...
I need to play games..
I need games to keep off the stress..
STRESS AH....
ARGH!

2009-03-09T16:49:00.001+08:00

Silly video....
And this is funny....

8 march 2009

2009-03-09T02:40:00.003+08:00

Supposedly should have gone to work...

BUT...
I somehow feigned sickness to not to go...
Not exactly feigned since i really was having headache..
***You treat me like shit when you have people to work for you..
And u worship me like god when u need ppl to help u..***
wtf sia...
Don't say i should be contented that i have a job...
Honestly i am contented to have a job..
A part time one that is...
But i am not happy with the way i am treated..
Because i am a part time worker..
I cannot go MOM!!!!

Anyway...Back to what i was SUPPOSED to blog about....
Went out with hubby and his family to Vivo...
Had dinner at The Japanese Restaurant(Was it the restaurant's name??)
Baby "bought"2 Levi's jeans...
(slaughter your dad huh)
$199.90 for 2...
Quite a steal actually..
But i no money...
Haix...
Supposed to get a lamp...
But can't seem to find it..
(The lamp with the boy's ahem as the switch?Any idea anyone?)
Anyway...
Before leaving went to Candy Empire..
Thanks hubby for this...But how dare you try to get something without me knowing..
But since you got it specially for me..(of course i knew you wanted to eat it yourself.. :X)
I'll forgive you..this once.. :)
Our darlings.. :)Pardon the shit....

Thanks hubby for this too... :)Sewn on the both sides...
I love it...
Hee hee~ :)
Done by my very gu niang boyfriend..
Whom is afraid of "something"
haha!
Talk about being manly?
Haha!~
To some extent he is..
But to most(okay..some) people..
He's gay..
To my point of view..
He looks gay..
But he's not..
Cox he's got me..
I'll kill myself if i got myself a gay boyfriend..
But we are gay tgt...(as in happy)
:)

2009-03-06T00:36:00.001+08:00

What has the world become?

Female sex tourism in Thailand: My girlfriend had paid sex with a Thai boy

Like DUH?!
My god~~~~

Read it on...

http://www.bangkokdiaries.com/2009/01/09/female-sex-tourism-in-thailand-my-girlfriend-had-paid-sex-with-a-thai-boy/comment-page-1/#comment-3027

The good...
The girlfriend is an ang moh...
The bad..
The Boy was Asian...
Zz

2009-03-05T22:50:00.002+08:00

Damn sad...
Lost the back of my earring...
My V Day pressie...
Argh...
B save dollar by dollar to get me that..
Haix...

I simply cannot find job..
Don't know why..
Am i really that suay?
Hmmm..

2009-03-01T00:30:00.003+08:00

Burnt my finger the other day..

Si beh pain sia!!!!!!
OUCH!!!

Help Bb did mask tt night at his house...

Tadah!!!
Cute right...
Those little clips belongs to his sister anyway....

Just for entertainment...
B's friend lost at a finger guessing game thus the forfeit....
Enjoy!!

Interviews....

2009-02-20T20:01:00.002+08:00

Gave the one today that i was supposed to go up...
Call me crazy..
Call me stupid...
Yea...
That's true what..
I AM CRAZY..
Am going to one this coming monday..
Honestly i hope that one get through...
It's a German 3PL Company..
YES..LOGISTICS..
As much as i hated..
I don't mind getting into one that is willing to teach me from SCRATCH..
The lady that called me up was from a HR agency..
And she laughed at me(not sarcastically thankfully) when i told her i haven't heard of that company before...
What's wrong la...
Study logistics never hear a particular company before...
Very farney meh?!
I didn't know why..
Till i told my dad about the soon to come interview..
Then my dad told me...
It's one of the largest logistics company in the world and the biggest in Germany..
I was stumped...
My mouth was opened damn big I SWEAR..
whole swarm of flies can go in...
Hopefully i can get in...
Have to do my "homework" before going to the interview..
Hopefully i won't flunk it like what i have done to my previous interviews...
Better find time to go to some temple to pray...
"Last minute hug buddha's leg"
Yaya...
True lar..
But pray at least more am xim ma...
Tio bo? Tio....

Boy go fishing tonight..
What am i to do to past time..
Wanted to go with Pi Gu and the other girls to check out Zirca tonight..
BUT..
He told me to wait for him...
I got fed up
And i decided not to go at all..
Yes..
That's how dirty my temper is..
*P/S: Dirty temper may not mean a very fiery temper although i can get fiery too..
Shall STOP going to all these places altogether...
At least for one month...
Save money..
Save my sleep...Zz...
Healthier lifestyle...*Don't Puui....
Haix...
What am i doing at home on a friday...
Nothing to do..
STITCH LOR...
Bo Liao lar..
But can pass time..
Don see me chor lor cannot do needlework hor..
Mai siao siao...

HAIX!

2009-02-17T01:29:00.002+08:00

I'm trying to stay happy...
In the midst of these ups and downs..
And the number of turns in my journey...

It's hard..
But it's my fate...
2 options...
1. Face it...
or
2. Stay away from it...

The constant little problems coming out here and there..
Mostly thanks to me...
The nutcase..
*Sometimes just feel like killing myself...*
What can i do?

Life's hard...
And it's getting harder...
Have to find ways to conquer them..
But as time goes..
It gets tiring..
Just like machines..
Humans break down too..
Hopefully i'd be able to hang on...
Hang on long enough.....

Anyway....Out of topic...
Happy 36th birthday to my brother...

Our first Valentine's Day~~

2009-02-16T21:49:00.006+08:00

Our first Valentine's Day~~

14.02.2009

How stupid can a guy look while holding a bouquet of flowers with a bear...Haha~

At least this smile is better.. :)

Me and the flowers...

Ok..I know i don't look good..... Cover My Face...

Change my mind.....

Fancy a Passion Fruit Souffle with Hazelnut sauce?!

MyFlowers.. :)

And the bear...He says i look like it...Do i?!

From Him to Me... :)

Hearts?.. :)

2009-02-13T20:02:00.001+08:00

Friendster Glitter Graphics
Myspace Graphics

Happy Advanced Valentine's Day to all~ :)

Day before V'Day

2009-02-13T16:18:00.003+08:00

Friday the 13th....
Not a very good day...
Went for an interview but i didn't get the job...
So sad...

Forget about that...
Came home very early and started making my Valentine's Day treats...
very simple thingy..
Cornflake chocolate...
Don't laugh...
I can't bake..
And i don't want to risk making loads of stones...
Anyway.....

Kelloggs Corn flakes and Lindt Dark Chocolate with 70% Cocoa...Tadah!!!

Ok...Nothing magnificent.....
Baaahhhhh~

Long

2009-01-30T00:44:00.002+08:00

CONTENT WARNING!!!!
Long Post.....

1. ONE OF YOUR SCARS, HOW DID YOU GET IT?
- the one on my knee....burnt by motorcycle exhaust pipe

2. WHAT IS ON YOUR BEDROOM WALLS?
- My bro's wedding photo...

3. WHAT DOES YOUR CELL LOOK LIKE?
- Zz....White W850i phone...which is going up the lorry soon...

4. WHAT MUSIC DO YOU LISTEN TO?
- Chinese, English......korean,jap, thai...

5. DO YOU KNOW WHAT TIME YOU WERE BORN?
-3 something am...

6. WHAT DO YOU WANT MORE THAN ANYTHING
- a happy life...

7. WHAT DO YOU MISS?
- my boy and our boy boy....

8. WHAT IS YOUR MOST PRIZED POSSESSION(S)?
-myself? :X

10. DO YOU GET CLAUSTROPHOBIC?
- Yes.........I prefer fresh air....

11. DO YOU GET SCARED IN THE DARK?
- yes.... very...

12. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON TO MAKE YOU CRY?
- my hubby... :,(

13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE COLOGNE / PERFUME?
- D&G for now....which i have yet to get... Zz

14. WHAT KIND OF HAIR/EYE COLOR DO YOU LIKE ON THE OPPOSITE SEX?
- Em...SOmething clean and simple?!

15. WHERE WILL YOU BE IN 3 DAYS TIME?
- Work?!

16. COFFEE OR ENERGY DRINk?? - Energy Drink..

17. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PIZZA TOPPING?
- Hawaiian

18. IF YOU CAN EAT ANYTHING RIGHT NOW, WHAT WOULD IT BE?
- sting ray...crayfish...stay...omg...

19. WHO IS THE LAST PERSON YOU MADE MAD?
- baby...

21. WHAT WAS THE FIRST GIFT SOMEONE EVER GAVE YOU?
- A necklace....or was it a photoframe?

22. DO YOU LIKE ANYBODY?
- i like alot of people :D

23. ARE YOU DOUBLE JOINTED?
- Nope.

24. FAVORITE CLOTHING BRAND?
- no specific one (: 2

5. WHAT'S YOUR DREAM CAR?
- Mini cooper

26. DO YOU HAVE SOMETHING IMPORTANT TO SAY NOW?
- I MISS YOU!!! :X

27. ANY SIBLINGS?
- yes. 3 elder brother :x

28. WOULD YOU FALL IN LOVE KNOWING THAT THE PERSON IS LEAVING?
- Maybe...

29. WHAT IS THE BEST WAY TO TELL SOMEONE HOW MUCH THEY MEAN TO YOU?
- hint?If they're too dumb to realise then forget it...

30. SAY A NUMBER FROM ONE TO A HUNDRED:
- 22

31. LAPTOP OR DESKTOP?
- laptop(:

33. WHAT ANNOYS YOU MOST?
- ANNOYING people.

34. HAVE YOU BEEN OUT OF THE COUNTRY?
- yea...like duh...

35. YOUR WEAKNESS?
- shan't name it here..... :x

36. COLOR OF YOUR BEDROOM?
- white and blue

37. FIRST JOB?
- flyer distributor.

38. EVER DONE A PRANK CALL?
- yea...who hasn't??!!

39. WHAT WERE YOU DOING BEFORE YOU FILLED THIS OUT ?
- playing Pet society in FaceBook, changing my blogskin....

40. IF YOU COULD GET PLASTIC SURGERY WHAT WOULD IT BE?
-slightly bigger boobs pls.....

41. WHY DID YOU FILL OUT THIS SURVEY?
- cause im bored....

42 WHAT DO YOU GET COMPLIMENTED ON MOST?
- tt i'm a good girl...hee hee~don call me ah lian..i'm just rough....

43. WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF ALCOHOL BECAME ILLEGAL?
-celebrte...cox baby will no longer have the reason to drink...

44. WHAT DO YOU WANT FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY?
- i dono..anything tt anyone give me?

45. HOW MANY KIDS DO YOU WANT?
- wan 2...baby wants 4..make it 3 then....

46. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?
- money perhaps.....

47. DO YOU WISH ON STARS?
-nope...used to when i was young though...

48. WHICH FINGER[S] IS YOUR FAVORITE?
- little pinky(:

49. WHEN DID YOU LAST CRY?
- errrrr...yesterday?

50. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
- nope....damn fugly....

51. DO YOU LOVE THE SCHOOL YOU ARE CURRENTLY STUDYING IN?
- no..but i miss school life...

52. ANY BAD HABITS? - lots....

53. WHAT IS YOUR MOST EMBARRASSING CD ON THE SHELF?
-all....hide them in the cupboard....

54. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
- why not?! i'm friendly!

55. HAVE YOU EVER TOLD A SECRET YOU SWORE NOT TO TELL?
- Nope.

56. DO LOOKS MATTER?
- It’s what’s on the inside that counts (:

57. HOW DO YOU RELEASE ANGER?
- just RELEASE...or swallow them...

58. WHERE IS YOUR SECOND HOME?
- hmmm..

59. DO YOU TRUST OTHERS EASILY?
- quite...i'm quite dumb i admit....

60. WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE TOY AS A CHILD?
- i dono...barbie dolls??

61. HOW MANY NUMBERS ARE IN YOUR CELL PHONE?
- no idea....

63. DO YOU USE SARCASM?
- whoa..all the time..hee hee...

65. WHAT DO YOU LOOK FOR IN A GUY/GIRL?
- i let my heart make the decision....

66. WHAT ARE YOUR NICKNAMES?
- hmmmmm....

68. DO YOU UN-TIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF?
- normally i dont.

70. WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM FLAVOR?
- Chocolate chips

72. WHAT ARE YOUR FAVORITE COLORS?
- I like ‘em all.

73. WHO DO YOU MISS RIGHT NOW?
- hubby

74. HOW MANY WISDOM TEETH DO YOU HAVE?
-no idea.

75. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO ANSWER THESE QUESTIONS?
- yes. but i doubt they are willing to :x

76. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO?
- nothing...

77. LAST THING YOU ATE? - hawaiin pizza...

78.THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? - hubby

79. THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE IN THE OPPOSITE SEX? - ehhhh...noidea....

81. FAVORITE THING TO HATE? - Enemies :D

82. FAVORITE DRINK(S)? - Iced milo, Ice lemon tea...etc.

83. HOROSCOPE? - Aquarius

84. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SPORT?
- walk walk walk

85 What's your hair color? - Brown.

86. EYE COLOR? - Brown.

87. DO YOU WEAR GLASSES? - sometimes when im at home. When im out it will be contact lens(:

88. AGE? - 21

89. HAVE ANY HEROES? - Nope.

90. YOU LIKE SUSHI? - yes.

91. LAST THING YOU WATCHED? - some hong kong serial...

92. FAVORITE DAY OF THE YEAR? - new year..cox got ang paos...

93. ARE YOU TOO SHY TO ASK SOMEONE OUT? - nope...haha

94. SUMMER OR WINTER? - Winter(:

95. KISSES OR HUGS? - both (:

96. RELATIONSHIPS OR ONE NIGHT STANDS? - RELATIONSHIPS

97. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU BOUGHT? - pizza

98. Who is least likely to answer these questions? - busy people.

99. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING? - Sex & the Immmortal Bad Boy by Stephanie Rowe.. :P

100. ARE YOU IN LOVE W/ANYONE? - JONATHAN TAN LIN KIAT

2009-01-29T23:35:00.003+08:00

Few more hours to Bb's SOL to be done with....
Shall be picking him up tml in his camp then off to his house to change and back to my house again..
My mummy left some popiah stuff for him..
And he's suppose to finish them off...
More ang pao's for me tml and saturday.. (hopefully)
I need money money....

Saw from Carol's blog on what she did for her boy's birthday cum anniversary...
Haha~
Same as what i did for me and boy's anni...
But hers is like..
So much nicer can...
Envy..
Still tell me she is not good at art...
Arghhhhh....
Should have taken more photos with boy......
BOY....
I'll BRING MY CAMERA WHEREVER I GO ALREADY LAR!!!!~~~~~

Hopefully all goes well to the job my cousin in law is introducing me..
hopefully the lady boss will agree to hire me...
Sian ah~
Why recession...WHY?
Grrr.....

2009-01-28T17:55:00.002+08:00

Happy New Year to everyone...
May all get many many ang paos......

My 21st....
Thanks to all the well wishes for my birthday...
Be it on facebook, friendster or face to face...
Thanks Yuxin,Huiwen, Edmund and Yuxin's parents for the dinner....
At Jumbo....

Thanks Mummy, Daddy and Bro for their ang paos...

Thanks My sis in law for the set of bangle,necklace and earring....

Thanks Jon's mum for the phone...

Thanks Jerlyn,Sebastian,Huizi,Yu min and Suhaili for the Chomel Necklace and Earring...
Thanks Tong Tong and Dino for the eye shadow...
Thanks Jon for spending the day with me....

Thank you for remembering.... :)

2009-01-15T14:59:00.002+08:00

FYP's DONE!!!!
Left with the presentation at LTH next wednesday...
Now's waiting for the pictures...
That includes me of course..
And boy..... i think i look like shit in them....

Countdown 2 days.....Zz

2009-01-12T20:52:00.002+08:00

Counting down to FYP presentatiom....
2 days more...
2 DAYS..
Poster not done...
WTF...
Zz....
Sibeh sian ah...
Chiong ah!!!!
ki siao liao...
AHHHHH!!!!!!!!
Time slot : 10:50 to 11:30
Room: E45B
sian sian sian...
Grrr..
Hurry up finish ah....
*cross fingers...

Bought my little boy to House of Chinchillas yesterday..
Hoping to cut off his extra fur growing t his eye area..
Turns out that he has an eye infection..
*Heart pain....
Anyway..
We left him there..
1. To pair him up with another chin... A pretty white chin with red eyes..
2. To treat his eye infection..
Hopefully all turns out well...
I don't want him to become blind..
And i hope the girl doesn't reject him...
I miss my boy boy... :'(

Prawn Prawn...

2009-01-06T22:14:00.004+08:00

Went Prawning with Baby at Pasir Ris Park yesterday..
$39 for 3hours+1 hour
2 person took that package and shared the 4 hours...
2 hours each...
Spent $40
And.........
We brought home 4 pathetic prawns
Cooked them in hua tiao chew..
And makan...
He was smiling cause he got he first catch...
A prawn head...
He was happy..
He caught 2 live prawns..
And me..
Caught one whole dead prawn and a clam shell..
WTF..
Dono is prawn catch us or we catch prawns..
But was fun..

P/s: Tiffs are bound to exist in a relationship... But i wonder if the tiffs we are having are getting bigger...Like the misunderstanding last night...And i realise that was how much you trusted me...And it hurts me..Deep..

Happy 2009

2009-01-02T20:42:00.003+08:00

Another year gone~~~

Happy 2009..

I sure hope it'd be good...

2008 had been a bad year for most people i suppose..

Though i doubt 2009 will be any much better thanks to the recession..

But i'll still pin a little hope on it.. :)

My New Year Resolutions for Year 2009

Find a job...(cause i'm graduating soon!!YEAH!)

Be a better girlfriend...

Help Baby's mummy change him... (I wonder)

Boy boy be a good boy...Don't start biting people...

Clear my debts

Save more money

A multi purpose bag? A longchamp one perhaps..Cheaper..

Love my Baby and our Boy boy more than ever (:P)

Baby and my kor kor's birthday just passed..
Conicidently their birthday's happens to be one day after the other..
And me and my kor kor's chinese birthday happen to be on the same day as Baby's birthday..
Baby's chalet was..
Okay...
Something nearly happened..
But i'm glad that it was stopped in time..

New year's Eve was spent celebrating my kor kor's birthday..
And then head to Boat Quay to meet Aloy and gang...
I was erm...
High..
And i fertilised the plants at Baby's condo...
His mummy was surprised that he came home so early that day..
Of course...
It was all thanks to me..
Baby is suppose to stay home for the next 3 months at least...
No more drinking for this period of time.. :)
Good...
Save money..
To support me.. Kekeke~ :P

My 21st like coming soon..
And i've got like..
No plans at all..
Sian ah...
Everyone is asking me to celebrate i simply have no idea what to do..
And seriously..
Don't feel like doing anything...
It's just another normal day isn't it?
We'll see how when the day comes....

Love of my life...

2008-12-25T01:21:00.004+08:00

It's X'mas..

Without the merry mood...

Anyways..

Merry X'mas to all..

By the way..

Introducing my new son...

My boy boy....

I love you baby...

2008-12-12T19:49:00.002+08:00

School's out today...
And guess what..
I missed my last lesson before the holidays..
Not intentionally all thanks to my headache..
My head is like still spinning now...
Grrr..
Bb coming over to stay tml so he'd be going to my uncle's house with me on Sunday...
Supposed to come today...
But he got Judo training and his cousin's birthday today..
I so need my antidote..
But he isn't free...
Haix..

Guess i can only depend on myself now...

..................................................................................................................................................

2008-12-11T21:16:00.002+08:00

My hong Kong trip gone....

Sad....

My pay cheque cannot get through...

Fark....

...........................................................................

Happy for ah min and Cassandra...

Found the love of your lives..

:)

Happy dating....

2008-12-09T21:01:00.004+08:00

Gave up the certification course thingy...
Cause i've got no money... :(

Hi Hong Kong...
Change of plans AGAIN...
Will be in Singapore on my birthday...
But leaving the next day for Hong Kong...
Thanks to baby's mum...
She was the one who talked about going to Hong Kong instead of the 2 of us going to Malaysia..
My expenses i guess all settled...
Baby say i don't have to think so much about that and that he has enough for both of us...
I hope so...But i better work more this month so i have extra on me...
Haven't really told my mum my decision yet...
I as a daughter asked her for pemission to go...
But i don't think she had to talk to me in that manner..
She said she dono what we are thinking of...
And ask me to decide for myself and tooot...
Hung up the phone...
Mum..Are you angry that i am going overseas with my bf's family during the chinese new year period..
Or are you just sian that you have to do everything yourself during that period...
SIAN AH.....

2008-12-05T20:44:00.002+08:00

Remembered the wrong for Baby's chalet...It's 26th to 28th instead...
And i asked my mum if they want to go..
She didn't give me definite answer but..
I guess she might go...
After that night i think really..
Things have changed for the better...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
One silly thing that made me freaking pek chek last nite..
All i ever wanted was to spend my 21st birthday my way...
We wanted to go Batam..
But she said it's "dirty"...
And i asked her about Bali
But she said it's near CNY and why should i go let people chop head...
I nv wanted any grand celebrations..
I don't even expect anyone..(in the family) to want to celebrate for me..
To me..It's just another day..
But since i have someone i love that is much closer to me now..
I want it to be a very simple and private affair..
What's so hard about that?
She simply just won't let me have it my way for once don't she...
Haix...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
6 Sigma lesson today..
Now then i realise i have already skipped it 8 times
And i can no longer afford to skip anymore...
I went into the classroom..
Sat at the middle table..
LIKE AN IDIOT...
And the stupid faci took soooooo darn long to shift me into a team...
I won't mind if i was sitting in a corner or there's someone with me at the table..
But middle table and all alone...
I hate looking like an idiot...
DARN...
Walked to the mrt with Majella, Daniel and Junior..
Was laughing like hell almost the whole time...
Majulah Singapura....Majella Singapura..
To think they can think of such things..
I bet Majjy is cursing me if she reads this...
Don't kill me Majjy...
Mrt all the way after Majjy alighted, with the guys..
Went to AMK hub...
Had wanted to get a pair of heels for work..
But i couldn't make up my mind..
So..off i go..
To the outside of hub...
And saw this little trinket cupboard...
It's pink and i thought of my niece and Baby's sister...
To play safe...I bought one first..
Show my mum before deciding if we want to get that for my niece too...
2 X'mas gifts settled....
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

2008-12-01T22:51:00.003+08:00

A small little change in my life...
Think slowly my family is accepting him..
I'm glad i made him stay over the other night... :)
He came to my house for dinner on Friday and we went out to Boat Quy for Dexter's birthday..
But left pretty early cause i was freaking tired...
Went back to my house to sleep..
On the same mattress and with my mum on the other mattress beside me and my dad snoring away on his bed...
Woke up the next day by my 2 little monsters..
And he..
I guess he sort of mixed into my family..
He played with them..
And brought them out(with me of course)
Wasn't a very happy outing thanks to my spoilt nephew..
Who simply can't keep his mouth shut..
And he threw the ball too hard at the arcade and hit my boy at his nose..
My boy lost his cool of course..
Rang up the monsters' dad and asked him to pick us up...
Back at the house..
Dinner together and my mum gave him a lecture after dinner..
Half an hour lecture that is...
But it was a good one...
My mum talked to him about a lot of things..
Which majority of it i wasn't listening to..
But really..
Was good interaction..
I guess my mum knew that he wasn't a bad guy..
Went on to our mahjong session...
a "healthy family game"..
As what my sis in law said...
We paid a school fee of $1.20..
That boy of mine don't even know when to game without me by his side..
Silly...
Went out to EZ after the game and this time round stayed at his house...
I was supposed to work the next day...
But i feigned sickness..
Reason #1 : Didn't have the mood to go to work..
Reason #2 : I just wanted more time with him...
I lost the money but i gained more time with him...
Spent the whole day with him and went home after sending him back to camp...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
December already..
That would only mean a number of events happening...
on the 10th...our 6th month anniversary...
How time flies..... :)
27th to 29th boy's birthday chalet...
The actual is on the 30th but he'd be in camp... Sad... :'(
I just hope he wouldn't need to go into DB and will be able to book out for his birthday...
Next next next...
My 21st birthday....
I should be out of town..
Boy already applied for leave
On the actual day i guess i'd be out of reach...
21st to 23rd..
But we don't know where to go yet...
So...
Any suggestions???
Yea..
That's it...

2008-11-24T18:42:00.006+08:00

I realise my blog have been very very full of words......Hence....

Shall put up some pictures...

My Darling niece...

I'm not the mother for goodness sake..

Though she does look like me when i was young..

Damn those aunties...
Do i look like a mum to you??!!

I know......I sould never cam-whore during working hours...Especially in the toilet..But i can't help it...IT'S FERAKING BORING!!!!

Fuck the eyebags...Geez...

My Boy and his Sister....

Mindgames??!!

Purpose of the hearts is not to show my love for him..

It's just to hide his nippies...

Before someone comes after me for posing indecent photographs..

Creation of Charmaine during Pharma class..

And no..this sotong head looks nothing like me..

But it's cute....

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`

I skipped my Retail UT 3 today...

Had wanted to go..

But don't see the point to rush to school just to take my UT..

Not going to school tml either...

Retail module again...

I've got doctor appointment at Tan Tock Seng...

Shall go to Baby's house early tml morning..

And SLEEP...

Yes...To sleep..

And have him accompany me to the doctor and off to buy my shoes for work...

My heels like broke yesterday while i was going for my dinner break..

Damn malu can..

And the stupid woman do nothing but said "Oh Dear"..

I think you could have helped just by shutting up...

Could have made do without your comments thank you..

Don't ask me how i broke it..

I really have no idea..

Walked halfway and "piak"..

Off it went..

So auntie Jocelyn helped me pluck the other side out..

And i went from walking...to shuffling the rest of the day..

Helped Chee Keong with his perfume sets...

Wrapped them with ribbons...

Made alot of "balls" or whatever u call them...

and i had the rest of the promoters asking me to make for them..

I bet the whole sales floor is full of my "balls"...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My Boy is out riding his bicycle again..

I wonder if he could even open his eyes tml..

Got this feeling that i'd be going alone at the end of the day to the doctors...

Am pondering over what to give him for his birthday next month..

Though he says it's alright to not have any gift as long as i'm beside him..

But it doesn't make sense for me to go empty handed right...

I expect something big on my 21st from him..

Hee hee...

Better not pin high hopes else i'd be very disappointed by then...

Guess i'll hand make some placard for him since i'm kinda poor...

Hmmm...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Keep having this urge to go for the SIA interview again..

COX i really don't know what kind of job i should go for...

HAix..

Wad should i do?

2008-11-19T15:28:00.001+08:00

I need to find a job....
Right after i graduate...
Zz...

2008-11-17T09:38:00.005+08:00

Went Dbl O last sat after hubby's daddy's birthday celebration...
And met yx and hw there...
Haix...
Nothing to say about that...
Had a mixture of feelings...
Was happy that i met them..
But unhappy due to a whole string of incidents that happened...
So tired of life....
Kena viral infection last week and went to school for like only 1 day...
Never even go for my FYP....
For the first time i felt so horrible..
And yet no one bothered..
Not even my parents...
My bf can't book out and i'm left there..
Dangling...
Barely alive...
Worked on Sunday...
Freaking tired..
I was like a wlking zombie..
First thing my mum did was to kp me when i reached home..
Half dead..
And the next thing i know when i open my eyes..
My dad kp me..
As much as i wanted to rest at home..
I didn;t...
I left the house..
Not wanting to hear more rantings from my parents...
And i';m so hungry...
I guess everyone's left their classes already.....
Haix..
I want my pooh bear with me...

2008-11-11T23:15:00.001+08:00

Geez...
I feel so shitty..
Kena flu..
And my whole body is ching like shit..
Plus headache..
So much that i skipped school and my UT..
Better still..
SCM UT...
The only module that i got D+ for my first UT...
Fark sia..
Baby's not feeling well either...
His back is pain and he couldn't even turn..
He was to come to my house to look for me..
But ended up..
Never...
Both of us sick..
Wonder wad's wrong with the both of us..
Tml FYP somemore...
Zz..

2008-11-10T21:11:00.003+08:00

Happy Anniversary Baby...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`
Having problems with my fucked up lappy..
Stupid free antiviruses
They are of NO USE...
Thought could uninstall them but end up cannot...
Thought nvm...
MAYBE they would stay there quietly..
But i was wrong
TOTALLY WRONG...
They popped out at the wrong time...
WORSE..
THEY KEEP POPPING UP..
Someone tell me how to get rid of this annoying stuff???
HAIX......
UT tml again..
SI BEH SIAN AH...
Today's Pharma UT confirm buang..
Heng UT 1's result not so bad....
But tml SCM UT...
DIE...

2008-11-07T12:32:00.003+08:00

I haven't been going to school again this week..
I guess my friends are too used to not seeing me already..
And yes i know..i missed out alot on the lessons..
Hve my 6 Sigma UT later..
Opened up the 6ps and gosh...
I know nuts..
But nvm..
Still going for the UT...
At least got a grade..
*****************************************
Have been keeping a look out for jobs already..
I'm totally at lost..
I don't what i want..
Geez...
Tot of going to another airline to try..
But the thought of my boy..forget it...
Tot of going for jobs at nightspots..
But..Thinking of both my parents and my boy..
Might not work out...
Someone tell me what to do...
Haix.....
************************************

Caught the movie "The Coffin" yesterday at TM..

It kinda sucks..

Boy was bored to like duh..

And i keep getting shocks from the stupid sound effects..

It wasn't really scary but gross..

And i can't stand the sight of the actors with the horrible make ups..

Will have night mares..

But still..

Like a typical girl..

I hid under the jacket most of the time before the "things" even came out..

And boy was like teasing and laughing at me throughout...

Shit him...

**************************************
Came across this email that a friend sent me...

Doctor's Last Word....
A 20-yr old pretty, sexy and sensual girl went to see a psychiatrist.
'Doctor, I'm so angry at my boyfriend that I must call him Bastard. I
feel that he's gone too far, and he deserves it.'
'Hmm? Such a word is strong and rude. But may be you have your own
reasons. Tell me about it so that I can help you.'
'Yes, thank you, Doctor. There was one night...we parked our car
besides the beach and we were alone... and... he held my hand....'
'Did he hold your hand like this?'
'Yes, Doctor. Exactly like how you're holding it now'
'If it's only this, he doesn't deserve to be called Bastard. It means
he doesn't want to be separated from you.'
'Then, he leaned his body towards me... and hugged me...'
'Like this?'
'Yes, Doctor. Exactly like how you're doing.'
'It's not a Bastard.
It means he wanna stay forever by your side'
'Then he kissed me...'
'Like this?'
'Yes, Doctor. Exactly like how you're kissing me.'
'If its only a kiss like this, seriously you can't call him Bastard.
it means he adores you.'
'Then he put his hands inside my clothes and touched my boobs, Doc...'
'Like this?'
'Yes, Doctor... exactly like that'
'It's not behavior of a bastard. It means he wants to protect you.'
'Then he took off all my clothes... slowly... '
'Did you resist?'
'No. I let him do it, coz I love him...'
'Did he take off your clothes like this?'
'Yes, Doctor. Until I'm completely naked like now......'
'He still doesn't deserve to be called 'Bastard, because it means he
wanna learn about your body completely.'
'Then he kissed me and put his.... inside me and had sex with me...'
.......................
'Did he do it just like what we do?'
'Yes, Doctor. Exactly the same'
'You still can't call him Bastard. It means he needs you.'
'But then he told me that he has AIDS'
All the staff and patients outside heard the doctor screaming,'
BASTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRD!'

2008-11-04T14:35:00.004+08:00

I screwed up at my SIA interview on Friday..

Kinda paiseh to say..

But yes..

I was ousted at the first round..

Geez..

My group was kinda strong..

All ang moh damn power..

I was alright even before i went into the room..

But i went all jittery when it was my turn to introduce myself and answer their question..

The qn: What do you think is the most important aspect in customer service?

All our answers were like the same..

But the 2 that got selected..

They told stories and they got in..

Geez..

It wasn't that hard actually but i guess if i had more confidence and be able to express myself properly..

It shouldn't have been a problem..

While waiting for my turn..

I looked around..

Tried to smile at the other girls waiting..

But they seem...Unfriendly..

And that's it...

Huiwen is asking if i want to try Silkair..But that's like next year?

Hmm..

Maybe i could consder other airlines...

But i guess my boy would be damn happy if i have up this choice for good..

Colleagues are asking me to keep trying..

Especially my manager who is an Ex-SIA girl herself..

"Keep trying no matter what.."

Sounds easy huh..But needs alot of courage leh dey...

Perhaps at the end of the day...

Tgis is just not my cup of tea..

Since it was never my dream nor my ambition... :)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It's tuesday and it's been a week and a day after she left this world...

Her news came out so big in the papers and yet we never saw it..

I didn't even know till Yuxin called me in the middle of the night on Thursday..

She passed away...Horribly..

That is seriously like no way a girl like her should pass on..

I remember the time when i first saw her in secondary school years ago..

She was that very very innocent little girl..

And she grew up fast..

And now...

This has to happen..

I was never close to her..

But we talked...

She's a friend to me..

I was stuned when i heard about her death..

But we have to accept it..

I wonder how her family is coping...

Supposed to go with Yuxin to madai to pay my respects..

But i had chalet the nite before..

But tt's an excuse..

I simply can't bring myself to go there..

Don't know why..

I just never liked to attend such things..

Anyway...

Rest in Peace girl..

Elizabeth Yau

27th October 2008....

http://forums.hardwarezone.com.sg/showthread.php?t=2142168

Blah Blah

2008-10-31T01:01:00.002+08:00

In 15 hours in should in the room along with a few other girls facing a small challenge in life...

Or a big one to some others.. :)

A little jittery now...

It's either a straight route or another ambigious route after today....

My baby just called and said he regretted asking me to try..

And asked if i could don't go for the interview..

My answer: Can i say no?

Not that i want this job more than i want a life with him..

But if i don't go, i might really regret in future...

Think of the money..

Think of the experiences..

Think...What kind of job would pay you to see the world?

Though i think i'd most likely not get through even the first phase...

But...Haiz...Just a try darling..

Don't get in and i'll just accept it as i'm not fated to be in that line..

Should go to sleep already..

Or i'd really look like a zombie tomorrow..

Wish me luck and to Kah Mun too.. *Winkx

2008-10-23T12:00:00.004+08:00

Oh my...
Scary sia...
Geez..
Did they just schedule anyone who sent in an application or did they really choose..
Sia la..
Should go for plastic surgery before going..
4pm..
A little late..
But good also..
Hee hee...
Directly opposite Baby's house...

by the way the bloggie add has changed to http://poohlovespiglet-10062008.blogspot.com

2008-10-22T23:07:00.004+08:00

I wonder if i'm right about this..

Heeded Kah Mun's advice to submit the pplication for SIA..

Ya la i know..

I look nothing like a Singaporeair Girl...

But what she said made sense..

Never have regrets..

Submitted my application already..

And guess what i saw..

5 ah?

I only passed 3???!!!!

God..

Duh....

See how's my luck la..

See if they reply..

Reply..Go..

Don reply..

SUA~

hahaha!

Told Bb..

He sounds..

disappointed..

He said he'll be damn sad if i got in...

And worried that some other guy might come in between..

B..

Do trust me or don trust the guys...

Ask ur heart..

U told me u don trust the other guys..

But think..

Even if someone thinks of something else..

But my heart is with u..

And u still say u don trust the guys?

When i cldn't possibly have change of heart?

Haix....

2008-10-19T02:10:00.002+08:00

FUCK SCHOOL!!!

CB...

Don engage useless staff can..

Bloody hell...

Submitted form already still come after me for school fees...

Reply back to them that i have already submitted like long ago..

And only to have a reply saying..

According to our records, we have not received your form....

$#^%$&^%*&^(

CCB...

HENG I GOT TAKE EXTRA FORM HOME...

NABEI...

Deadline 20th OCT..

I nv take tt means i cham la..

SACK YOUR USELESS STAFFS U RUBBISH SCHOOL....

2008-10-18T00:12:00.002+08:00

My bro's going back to Aussie tml night..
Gve up meeting Bb for my brother..
Which i really should...
Cause i see my bro like once for dono how long....
Bb booked out already..
Went to see him just now..
Just for a while and he went out riding his bike...
So..
Alone i went...To Cityhall..
He thought i went home when in fact i didn't..
Went to eat at Makansutra first..
The flies were fucking irritating...
Duh...
But nevermind them...
Walked over to Marina Square to walk walk see see..
Quite a number of SALES going on..
But cannot buy..
WHY?
Cox my pocket is empty...
Nevermind that too..
It's a Friday..
And i am attached..
Yet i'm walking around all alone...
Can't blame anyone but myself...
Seeing those couples walking past me make me envy..
Not that i don't have a Significant Other..
But simply just i told him..
If you want to ride...Go and ride..
I'll find my own entertinment..
He realises that i went walking around lone only when i was nearly reaching home...
He said it made him feel bad..
I'm sorry f u really did...
But seriously i'm okay alone..
As much as i hoped for him to be by my side..
I won't be so selfish to tie him to myself..
And i know he's not the kind of walk walk see see guy...
He's more like n arcade guy..
A place where i seldom go to before i met him..
Now..I've become a regular...A regular standee...
Standing down there, occasionally sitting on chair beside him..
Watching him play or stoning there...
HAix...
He knows i don't like it..
Cox i've been showing my sulty face everytime we walk into an arcade...
Haix...
Actually i don't mind going..
But tht is if i am also playing..
He tries to get me involved...
Playing phtohunt with me sometimes..
But it doesn't help that he isn't even paying attention to the screen in front of us..
Dear...If you wan to play..give your full attention...
It simply spoils my mood and then yours when ur finger is here at the screen but ur eyes and heart is with the "cars".....

Haix...
Nuff said...

Ramble~~

2008-10-14T22:24:00.002+08:00

WAAAAA~~~~

Liong ah liong ah..

I freaking need more money....

I fucking need more jobs...

Ahhhh.......

Any lobangss????!!!!

Duh...

Didn't go to school today cox kena gastric last night..

Bear with it the whole night till 3.30am..

Cannot tahan anymore...

Went to the toilet..

And..

VIOLA~~~~

What a beautiful sight...

MY PUKE!!!

Red one sia..

Got chao sng taste sia..

Freaking bitter sey..

Think it was the chilli i ate...

Bahhhhh~~~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

By the way..

I've got another blog..

For me and my boyfriend..

It's..

http://pandalovespiglet-10062008.blogspot.com

I know i know...

Sounds kiddish..

But cute WAD!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`

I'm Happy...

WHY???

#1 Tml no nid to go LTH...

#2 I'm done setting up the bloggie(though it doesn't take up much time)

And I'm Unhappy...

WWWHHHYYY????

#1 I'm broke...fucking broke...

#2 I'm feeling quesy...my stomach is in a war..

#3 I haven't watch the VCD i bought 1,2 week go..

#4 The cuckoo haven't tell me my application for my school fees approved already anot...

#5 WHY I HAVEN'T GRADUATE FROM SCHOOL????!!!!

2008-10-11T19:43:00.002+08:00

Went for Jerlyn's R.O.M yesterday..

Very nice place..

Wasn't very grand, but it's great enough for them.. :)

The heart shaped balloons~

The music..

The atmosphere was nice..

I was wondering why would nyoe hold an R.O.M at a chalet..

But after this, it's not a bad thing afterall.. :)

A pity i missed the solemnisation part...

The ending part was great..

Saw how the couple danced..

Though could tell they were a little paiseh,perhaps cause there are elders around..

But still nice...

They were supposed to be the main attraction but seems like a kid stole all the limelight..

The new age DANCING KING~ :)

Cute boy~

My boy started asking when's our turn..

Good question..

Not that i don't want to..

But it's simply too early..

And what do we have to be able to get hitched?

No money no talk..

This is the real world...

U can't fill your stomach with LOVE..

But i didn't tell him that...

I said:

"No flowers, No diamond Ring, No proposal and u want me to marry u.."

And his reply...

"Ok...U say one~Next month...You wait..."

Yea...I'll wait...

I may or my not nod my head..

Even though i did already..

TWICE..

Saying is not enough darling...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Can't believe my Saturday is gone just like that...

Haven't gone clubbing for ages and now...MOS had closed down..

Zz..

Don't tell me there's still Phuture..And a whole list of clubs out there..

Tht was like the first club(other than Devil's Bar) that i went to..

Got memories sia..

Sian ah...

Should have gone to work just know if i had known i'd be spending the whole day at home...

Fully blur, half asleep and half awake..

I HATE THIS...

Should have agreed to work..

Y am i so dunb?

Duh...

My life is like Zz..Dead..

I kinda miss my previous lifestyle...

Though i didn't have a love interest then..

But i was happy..

Though with trouble too..

Not that i'm not happy now..

But the worries piled up..

Haix..

So tired..

So vexed.

Can i just go to bed, off my handphone...And sleep for a few days straight?

Can i ?

2008-10-09T22:38:00.001+08:00

Must you keep going out..

Just a call and out you go..

ARGH!!!!!!

PEK CHEK AH!

2008-10-09T19:45:00.003+08:00

Sometimes i just wish to get out of the house sooner..

Told baby just now and his reply...

Get married lol...

Haiz..Do you see marriage as a game?

I'm seriously wondering..

If i were to get pregnant..

Should i just keep the baby and get married?

Or should i get it out and move on with life...

Haix..

Jerlyn's R.O.M tml..

Wonder when would be mine...

Don't laugh..

It's normal for girl to want to get married..

Though i've always said i don't mind being left on the shelf..

But it's still a girl's dream...

~~~~~~~~~

Just wanted more time for him..

Why do you have to restrict me..

I'm old enough to think..

I'm 20..

not 12...

I know what's right and what's wrong...

I know what i'm doing...

You said as long as i'm happy..

It's okay...

Now you telling me this shit..

Giving me this kind of attitudes...

Have you got any idea that would make me want to even more leave this house...

Just give me a break..

PLEASE..

2008-10-05T12:38:00.002+08:00

A mixture of feelings...

I'm Happy..

Cause my baby "proposed" again..

Just to get engaged..

He knows i don't want to get married so soon...

But how do i go about telling my parents..

But anyway..

I agreed..

Since it's between me and him..

~~~~~~~~~~~

And i'm sad..

Cause my brother doesn't like him..

Though he says it's not important whether he likes him or not..

My happiness is more important..

But never did he realise i'll never be happy if my family doesn't support whole heartedly..

As much i feel like i'm not really part of the family at times..

But they are still part of the reason why i'm living..

I live for myself..

I live for my baby..

I live for my family...

I'm getting emo again........

And i hate that feeling...

I just want to live a simple and happy life...

Is it that hard?...

2008-09-25T22:23:00.002+08:00

I have 2 things to blog about..

1 happy...1 headache...

The Happy Issue...

My brother came back from Australia and gave us all a surprise..

I missed him so much.

Even though he has been a very strict brother while i was growning up all the years..

But i knew he loved me..

I'm his only sister afterall..

It should have been a happy occasion..

But here comes the headache part..

My boy's angry with me AGAIN...

REASON?

Cause i left his house without him..

He agreed to accompany me to have dinner with my family tonight..

We..or rather he..

slept till 4pm..

slacked at his livig room and end up falling asleep on the sofa...

tried to wake him up seeing the time is really getting late..

But he refused to budge..

Went to take my bath..

And he still won't move..

And i left alone without him...

Am i wrong?

I don't want everyone to wait for us like we are some big shot...

And i don't want him to have not enough rest...

Yet he doesn't understand my intentions and says that i don't understand him...

I know u want to accompany me..

But not at the expense of sacrificing ur resting time..

Haix...

Now..

He's still angry..

And i'm haveng a headache...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Baby bought another PSP..

From his friend....

$300 bucks...8gb memory card..

haix..

but he haven't paid him yet...

like duh....

Went drinking with him, danny and his girlfriend...

First at Pasir Ris Park....

Nice ambience..

But transport is bad...

Next move on to Ez 50s..

the place where Baby's dad always frequent..

And also the "club" that Jackie Chan opened....

Haix...

Drank quite alot...

Headache....

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Is my freaking manager going to meet me or not...

I WAN TO SLEEP LA...

SI BEH PEK CHEK...

@$%$#^%$&$

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

2008-09-23T21:01:00.002+08:00

1 whole week without updates..

REASON:

I've got nth to update~

My life is Boring..

Yes..

BORING..

I realised i'm having this phobia towards my Retail Logistics Facilitator..

Like OH MY GOD..

For the first time in my life of 20 freaking years..

I developed a phobia towards a "teacher"???!!!!

Sounds ridiculous..

But it's true..

PErhaps it's the wy that old man stresses people..

Scary old man we have there...

Am NOT looking forward to Mondays....

BAHHHHH~~~~

BUT

I AM looking forward to the END OF THE SEMESTER...

which is like still 13 weeks away...

Someone please tell me school hasn't just started like 3 weeks ago?

DUH!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Am meeting my Baby after school tml since he's booking out...

Poor him...

Duty after Duty after Duty....

Not enough rest..

He have better not fall sick again..

Else this time i'll really collapse...

Meet him tml and let him rest on Thursday...

Shall go out with Daniel an the peeps instead then..

For Dan's birthday...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Freak...

can i have my pay...

i'm fucking broke..

#$#^%$&%^&%

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

2008-09-16T20:41:00.002+08:00

TIRED AH!!

I freaking need a break can...

Am so exhausted can....

Grrr...

Tml got FYP again...

PENJURU AGAIN..

AHHHH!!!

I hate school...

Duh...

School better ends fast fast.....

***************************************

As for my problems...

Sort of half settled...

Though i'm still having headaches here and there..

Trying to find possible ways to eliminate the problems..(which seems impossible..)

****************************************

Baby have been having headaches very frequently lately...

No idea what is wrong with him..

And i simply have no chance to accompany him to see a doctor..

He is to see the doctor in camp..

But seems like other than prescribing medicatio to him..

The stupid doctor did NOTHING...

Duh....

Should ask his mum to brng him to some brain scan one day to check what is wrong with him...

High degree....

2008-09-11T20:33:00.003+08:00

Had been a "missy" for the past few days...

Cause baby was down on fever...on and off...

nearly scared me to death when his temperature went up to 39.3...

His mum just sent him to the doctor gain and he told me he felt better after a jab..

Hopefully my baby could be active again real soon...

Hurts me to see him like that...

I know i know..

I sound like a mum..

But that's normal isn't it?

Damn tired can..

For the first time...

I freaking dozed off on the mrt on the way to school this morning..

And i nearly missed a stop...

Zz...

I am THAT tired..

Though i didn't attend school...

Haiz..

Had "free" snacks today thanks to Daniel...

Thanks to him refusing to take the money and wanting to treat us...

Heng we never really buy much..

I bought the most things and i feel bad not returning him...

Eh uncle..

I know u meant well...

Being gentlemanly...But hor...

earning money not easy leh...

Ya la..i know..

I say lidat but i keep spending money...

Dono y..

The more u make...the more u spend...

That's life...

Just bought a nude-bra from AMK...

$19.90..

Sticky sia..

But heng it comes with a strap...

finally for once i could wear my tubes without the straps..

If not damn fugly...

I've got a feeling i'll be the one down with fever next..

After baby..

Yesterday..(10th September)

was supposed to be our 3rd month aniversary..

Yes...I know...no big deal...

We spent the whole day together...

Starting from Tan Tock Seng..

Where he had his appointment for his hand fracture..

Then back to his house..

For him to rest...

He didn't eat much an really...

His body turned red when his temperature suddenly rises....

I felt damn helpless..

And damn useless...

Could do nothing but watch him suffer..

When he slept i was outside watching TV....

Either that or i slept with him..

Stayed on till his parents came back..

Had dinner...

Coached his sistera little...

And he gave me money to take cab home...

And that's how we spent our anniversary..

What a way to spend our anniversary together...

Nevermind...

3rd month gone..

But still got the 100days one..

sounds like some funeral kind of thingy but got ppl celebrate too wad..

hopefully i won't be the one falling sick...

2008-09-10T01:45:00.000+08:00

A chat with Aloy really helped..
After all he is Baby's cousin and they have strong brotherly ties..
He's a nice guy actually..
Although he admits he's one who can't commit unlike baby..
But at least his thinking is mature enough..
As compared to baby...
Not trying to compare the two cousins...

At least i have someone whom i can talk to about baby since they grew up tgt and knew each other inside out..
At least i have someone whom can pass a message through to baby if he simply won't get what i told him into his head...
Someone to "share" my burden...
He assured me that Baby is a good guy...
I know he is...
It's the ladies around that are getting scarier....

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Gotta sleep already...
Meeting baby for his doctor appointment tml morning...
My troubles to be set aside for now...
Just hope things wouldn't be that complicated...
Hope she wouldn't hurt him....

2008-09-08T02:27:00.002+08:00

She's at it again...

Didn't go home..AGAIN..

Spent the night out with baby's cousin..

What is this..

Just when she ended on fling..

She got onto another..

And i know this guy...

If it's bb's friend maybe i can still take it..

his cousin...

for goodness sake..

Bb was furious..

Dare not even look at him when he vented his anger the wall..

Felt so bad..

Shouldn't have asked her out the night before..

She slept with us at Bb's room..

She on the bed and we on the floor...

If i wasn't working i'd still be alright with them being alone..

But i was working...

Fucking no mood to work the whole day...

I should trust both of them..

I trust Bb more than i trust her..

Though i know her longer..

But given her character..

I don't know..

Something might or might not have happened between them..

I don't know..

I don't want to think...

Told Baby why i was so angry last night..

And he promised not to offer to put any other girl up..

Even if it's my best friend..

When i would not be around with them...

She came along again last night with us when Baby and i met up with his cousins again...

She was SUPPOSED to go home..

Was too tired to stay on when bb said to go home..

I trusted his cousin wouldn't do anything funny

And i entrusted him with the task to see her home..

Only to receive a call from Aloy to ask for her number..

And when she called and told me she didn't go home again..

And they are not at his house and isn't too sure where they are either.

I nearly fainted..

Could you PLEASE LOVE URSELF?

I din expect you to just sleep with a guy u met only twice...

And hello..

you have a boyfriend...

How could i ever face him again if he were to find out..

If he wouldn't find out i'd still have a serious problem trying to face him...

And the guy u slept with..

How am i to face him too.....

It was all my fault..

I couldn't even really face baby...

Shouldn't have asked her out..

And if i didn't..

These problems wouldn't be there..

Reached home at 1+ in the morning to find dad's room light still on..

He's lying on the bed and he said he isn't feeling well when i went to him...

What kind of a daughter would make her dad..

especially when age is catching up with him..

Wait for her to come home when he's not feeling well and need more rest...

I couldn't take it anymore..

I surpressed myself these 2 days..

And after these things happen...

My tears just came down without warning...

I'm a sinner..

I feel usesless....

It's said that everyone is alive for a reason..

What's mine then?

Why am i even living on this earth...

Why?

2008-09-03T22:46:00.003+08:00

He's out again...Without me..As usual...

:'(

**********************************

School's starting tml...

HAix...

Be counting down on the days it finishes....

i want it to be done fast....

***********************************

Don't feel like talking...

Or typing anymore for now...

Bye..

2008-09-01T00:13:00.003+08:00

I am sooo....TIRED!

work work work work...

But good also...

Better i keep spending..

BUT...

now i'm contradicting..

I just got my very very pathetic pay of a hundred over dollars..

And now..

I'm online shopping...

I ordered....

This

This...

This......

And This......

Safer tops...

Won't have him nagging at me again just because he don't like other guys to look at me..

Please la..

Not as if your gf is very pretty..

I'm a woman after all..

Got guys look at very normal wad..

Haix...

Looks like my spags can only be worn below those cardigans...

Duh.......

Oh oh oh....

And..

I want this...

Hee hee hee....

Nice fragrance...

But i no money... :(

****************************************************************

More work tml and tuesday..

And school is reopening..

There goes my holiday...

Wed or Thursstart school..

Friday,saturday and sunday working AGAIN..

Thanks to the promotion going on...

Could be staying over at Bb's house next weekend since his parents are not at home..

And since his house is nearere to Tampines...

Save my time..

Haha..

Work and get to be with my bf still..

Else he'd be complaining again...

Haven't seen him for nearly one week...

I miss his Italy again..

Duh...

Tml...

Tampines..

Sian sia!!!!!!!

Better have sales tml..

Duh....

$0 on friday...

$0 today...

If $0 again tml..

I think i gone case..

Zz....

Sleeping time!!!!

2008-08-27T00:47:00.007+08:00

Blardy Hell...

The stupid woman gave me the red card..

Just because she assumed i can't be able to brig in sales for her...

Hello..

Don't judge people lidat can..

just because i'm quiet doesn't mean i can't work..

Never mind..

It's your loss...

Shall help out my manager to manage the counter stuff instead...

Earn lesser but i think i'd be happier..

And i get at least a day to rest.....

Facing my smiley customers is better than facing that old hag..

Yea...i sound bad...

No...I AM BAD..

But i'm just speaking from my heart...

I knew there'd be trouble the moment i saw her..

Sorry for giving Ken the trouble to find another few girls to that picky woman...

Yes.

She changed not just me..

But another too..

Out of 4..

Sha changed half..

And the event is like a few days away??

Crazy woman..

Don't care...

**************************************

Haix....

Why?WHy?WHY?

Don't remind me of school can....

Results are out and the new Time table is out...

Ow.....I just HATE school..Duh...

Introducing my last 4 modules of my polytechnic life..

Excluding FYP 2 that is...

Talking about FYP...I got a C for FYP 1...

Surprisingly...

I expected a D can...

And my GPA....SUPER BUANG!

Shan't talk about it already....

Just be glad that i passed...

Okay...

Lean Manufacturing and Six Sigma Class.... E44E...

Supply chain Management Class.....E44E.....

Retail Logistics Class....E44B...

Pharmacuetical and Bio-Chem Supply Chain Class...E44E....

Pathetic can....16 people only...Kaox....

I so need to sleep can...

Grr...

Oh yeah..

I've got a blazer for my uniform..

At least i look smarter..

Though Baby laughed at me when he saw me wearing it just now on my way home..

But i know..

I looked good in that...

okay..

BULLSHIT!!

Nuff said....

2008-08-24T23:47:00.002+08:00

I don't geddit..

I'm a person with very little words..

And what's wrong with that?

You're talkative and u expect me to talk as much..

My life's boring and i have nothing to talk about...

And what's wrong with that?

I know u're unhappy but that is a fact..

A character which i can never change...

And i'm sorry for that..

And i love you..

Preparing myself for one whole shot of 9 days of working..

For money..

I must push on...

2008-08-22T22:13:00.002+08:00

I wanna get new fragrances...

One to be exact..

Don't have the money to get too many..

Am thinking of getting something sweet but not too strong..

Am currently using Escada's Sunset Heat..

But it seems like it's finishing real soon..

I wonder how i used it...

Hmm..

Was late for work today but who cares..

No one was there..

And i doubt anyone woud even realise even if i were to decide not to turn up after all...

Spent most of my time doing Sudoku at the counter..

More time roaming around Bishan...

Zz..Boring..

Bought a skirt at G2000 for $25..Usual was $49..

A white one that is..

Just for work..

Wonder why they need us to wear white skirt..

Duh...PAP ah...

Am thinking whether to get another one or not...

Hmm...

Den off i went to roam around somemore..

Went into SASA...

Tried a few perfumes.

I find F for fascinating by Ferragamo..

And Dream of Pink of Lacoste..

The better smelling ones..

It doesn't matter how long they've been out..

But..

Which should i choose?

Suggestions???

I needed something that can last longer..

But i realise it really depends on individual..

Not the brand of the fragrance..

So...

Which should i get..

Shall get yuxin to help me check out the prices at DFS...

Kekeke...

Off tml and sunday..

But i've got an intervew at 10 am tml morning..

After that...

I wonder should i go to Baby's house or go home first..

He's out tonight AGAIN..as usual..

And i wonder if he could wake up tml...

Don wish to go to his house and face a sleeping buddha...

He's gonna get his shoes..

And me.

Just spend some time with him before my long work schedule starts..

He'll go "kao beh"..

As usual..

Darling...I'm just trying to earn a living..

And i don't see anything wrong with that...

Am i wrong?

Hmm.....

The little voice in me...

2008-08-22T00:03:00.003+08:00

I am SO very TIRED!

GeeZ!

I tot i'd be like rotting fot the whole of my holiday..

But looks like i'm wrong..

So.. VERY WRONG!!!

My whole holiday is PACKED...

I wonder if i could take it...

I'm so sorry to my boy that i have to work and neglect him..

But i can't help it..

Can't bring myself to turn down...

It's money ya know!!!

It's like something that we all MUST have..

I think i'm kinda scared of living a life full of monetary difficulties...

And that's why...

Boy...If only you could save?

I guess if you could i wouldn't be forcing myself to work...

Don't get the wrong idea..

I am NOT supporting my boyfriend..

I just needed money to pay my brother..

And of course..

Save money...

Grrr...

For wht you must be thinking...

Just to prepare myself if..

I mean IF...

One day i end up being all lone..

Not having a man who wants to marry me... (like duh..now what era already...)

I would have my own savings and do what ever i like.. :)

Tomorrow work at Bishan then 2 days off...

Before i embark on my sibeh tedious schedule...

Non-stop from Monday..(the 25th) all the way till 2nd Sept...

9 days right..

No big deal right..

Think of it..

A person with lots of health problems like me..

Hmm..

I wonder if i can really take it..

I'm no longer the 16year old who can one shot work all the way without even resting..

YES..

I'm old.. :(

It's sad but it's fact and i accept that fact..

Grrr....

Let's see...

25th- Junction 8...Packing up of the counter...

26th-Century Square...Travel till my butt open...

27th-Bugis Junction...Go there kill mosquito..If there is..Zz..

28th to 31st-COMEX Fair..Suntec City...Wonder if it'd be fun... Duh..

!st and 2nd not too sure whre i'm working YET...

Probably Tampines again...Baahhh....

3rd..School Re-opens..

SIAN AH!

1 more semester to go before i can get out of school completely....

Grrr....

As much as i hated school...

I think i'd miss schooling life..

Don't get me wrong..

My schooling life as in the very seng nang life in poly...

The fun times i had in secondary school...

The laughters..The talks...The "Chalet"...

I hereby pronounce.....

I miss school..

Awww....

I know..i sound fake..And i'm talking to myself again..

Baaaaaahhhhh~

Just another day..

2008-08-19T00:05:00.003+08:00

I am soooooo tired....

I used to think that maybe i could get use to living all alone..

But i guess i was wrong about it...

These few days my parents are not round..

And when i step into the dark and empty house..

I have this very lonely feeling inside me..

Perhaps i was wrong about having that thinking...

It should be time to re-think.. :)

*****************************

Lovelorn...Thanks for being my listening "ear" when i have these whole chunk of problems stuck to my brains and i can't tell anyone else...

As for her...I guess we are all at our wits end..Even she is having problems trying to reach a decision..

It's understandable since we've somehow been through almost the same things..

But the main problem is...Making choices...

She doesn't know how to make a choice and doesn't want to force herself to make a decision..

She doesn't think she is selfish...

To her...She needs a companion..

He's been out of the country for the past few months and that was why she found herself these life buoys..

But from what we see....She isn't just treating this guy as a life buoy..

She fell for him already..

And she's stuck in between..

One is a guy whom she thinks she can live together for the rest of her life even though their feelings have faded...

Another is a guy whom she sees their future as blurry..

That's the reason why she can't make a choice..And she did mention to me that both of the guys dotes on her...

I guess there's nothing we can do now...The rest is all up to her..

I just hope she'd get out of this thing soon...

And as for my marriage to what you called my-sai-nai-cute-bf....

STILL A LONG WAY TO GO LA!

Haha...

There's no way i'm going to wear that wedding gown unless that boy's thinking gets matured nd he had enough of fun...

Running around every weekend..

And me..

Staying home while he have fun..

Shan't force things la..

We'll see how everything goes..

Who knows.. Maybe not us...But you be the one to wear tht gown first...Hee hee hee :)

*****************************

Work work work these few days...

Grr..Tiring...

Commission soooo pathetic...

Haix...

*****************************

He should be comng over for dinner tomorrow..

If he could book out.

If not...I'd be all alone again...

:) Ciaoz..

Twisted...

2008-08-17T17:09:00.002+08:00

Supposedly a girl's night out after slightly more thn 2 months on Friday..

Baby was SUPPOSED to be at MOS and i at Phuture..

And SUPPOSSEDLY we should be having our own fun with our own friends..

Still..

Thanks to Raine...She said she wanted to go Phuture to find Jason..

That was what Baby told me anyway..

So my lesbian night is gone...

I thought i'd meet baby when it's time to go home..

Erm..

His home that is...

But ended up the whole night..

I'm stuck at a corner with him...

I wanna grind people..

Girls to be exact..

Don feel good grinding guys..

Call me a wierdo..

But that's what i am..

Haven't really enjoyed myself since i got into this relationship..

But i'm not trying to grumble here.

Night is gone...

Had a little fun maiking fun of Raine..

Think i couldn't make myself open up since i'm such a lousy dancer..

I missed "messing" around with the girls..

Geez...

Haix..

Good and Bad for the night..

The Good...

I paid only $5..

My gf paid for the rest..

So fine...I paid just to get in...

And my baby was there...

Lots of hugs..

And lots of tongue fighting to tease Raine...hee hee..

The Bad..

Didn't really have fun...

The music sucks...

Went off around 2am (Ya i know it's damn early...)

Off to his house for my sleep...

Whatever happens behind close doors..

Hee hee..

Ask me if u wanna know.. :P

Went to Tampines Mall with his family the next day for grocery..

Then went back to his house, waited for his auntie to come..

Went out for dinner at Vivo..The Imperial..

Yes...I zhuan dao again...

The bill came up to about $400+

And when i heard his dad say..

My eyes widened till it nearly dropped..

And his dad saw it..

Sorry ah uncle..

I not trying to be so kua zhang la..

But i'm brought up eating zi char with bills coming at most to about less than $100?

And with my whole family...

IE..My bro and their wives..

11 people less than $100..

8 people $400+

See the diff?

Rich oso cannot lidat hua qian ma..

Haix..

As much as i know they are willing to pay more to get good food..

I saw abalone and sharks fin..

But i didn't order that...

All i asked for was some kind of soup with cooling effects..

Yes yes..

I'm stupid..

I should have asked for sharks fin..

I don't mind drinking canned sharks fin

I won't even order sharks fin when i'm with my own faily..

So, why would i order that when i'm with my boy's family..

Seriously don't want people to think that i'm with this guy cause his family is rich...

I know his dad is rich has nothing to do with him..

He's pretty broke actually..

Not a spoilt brat which i am half happy..

The reason why i am not happy is he's more than willing to spend..

Even though he's salary is only $500 a month..

And he would end up not having enough money to last for the rest of the month..

Anyway..

Went back home after dinner..

The whole house is empty..

My lao peh bu will only come back on Wednesday..

And baby is booking in tonight..

And he's like still sleeping at home at this time..

That's for reaching home only around 5am in the morning..

Haix...

Work tml and tuesday...

And possibly 8 days without having anything to do...

28th to 31st Comex Fair..

Thanks to Daniel for that lobang.. :)

And school's starting again on the 3rd of September.....

SIAN AH!!!!!!!

Last semester before i can graduate..

I lun..i lun..i lun lun lun...

Grrr...

I hope time pasts fast fast...

Faster graduate..

Faster find job..

伍家辉 - 虽然我愿意

2008-08-15T01:27:00.001+08:00

伍家辉 - 虽然我愿意

请让我靠近你轻轻对你说

别让我每个夜为你受折磨

是多么不容易才默默放手

为了我就当作这次为了我

别让我因为你被回忆折磨

而空气凝结了我们的脸孔

我别无选择

就算我们之间有什么问题

依然想念着你

虽然被放弃

虽然我愿意

就算我们之间有什么难题

黑夜我还想着你

心碎人孤寂

虽然我愿意

再让我靠近你轻轻对你说

当我说我要你从此好好过

是真的否则我怎么肯放手

为了我就当作这次为了我

赐给我你现在幸福的笑容

别让恨冻结了我们的脸孔

请你做选择

就算我们之间有什么问题
依然想念着你
虽然被放弃
虽然我愿意

就算我们之间有什么难题
黑夜我还想着你
心碎人孤寂
虽然我愿意(心还想着你)

I'm so so so in need of a job....

2008-08-14T23:53:00.002+08:00

Sian ah!!!!

Zo lang pai mia ah.. (*It's hard being a human...)

Bo gang zo sian.. (*No job sian..)

Bo gang lui nia ko ka sian...(*No salary to get more sian)

Haix...

Pardon me..

Not trying to be like some woman complining at the coffee shop using hokkien..

But really sibeh the sian..

Grr...

Confirmed with Janice that the counters are closing down this 20th...

And YET..She never inform us..AT ALL!!!

Till i sked..

Knn..

Hello..

I'm supporting myself..

I need money..

Howthe fuck can some company be so selfish and plan to tell the employees that we are given the sack so last minute..

Kana sai...

And i'm haveing my holidays...

Brrrrr....

Thought i could at least go JTC work..

At least i still have income..

Kana sai

End up too late...

And she still dare to bring it up tt they need temp staff..

Thanks for the help ah..

Next time check properly den say can..

Wad am i to do this holiday...

I fucking need money can..

I go collect cardboard la...

Kns...

Grr...

Going Phuture again tml with the same bunch of people..

Yes...It's boring...

I know...

Baby going MOS and i going Phuture..

For the first time we have our own entertainment for the night..

I just hope he'll just trust me..

gosh..

the whole world knows i won't be an unfaithful partner can...

But no worries...

No other guy can try to fuck me except u..Baby..

Oops...

Getting vulgar again...

But at least i dare say i don't sleep around..

Don care so much la..

Just try to enjoy my night tml and not think of anything...

Grrr....

Blabber blabber...

2008-08-13T22:42:00.002+08:00

Just as i expected...

He's out again..

Called me before he went out to ask for permission to ride his bike...

Permission granted...

But am not allowed to speed nor drink too much...

Only one drink allowed....

Still..

Disappointed...

Dared to tell me that he and his friend rode at 160..

He said a car was near..

So..

Fine...not his fault..

I just hope he would keep to his promise to drink only 1..

HAIX....

Tml going to the hospital alone...

Expected..

Wonder if i want to go to his house after that...

Sian ah....

Parents going to Malaysia this weekend..

Friday my bro coming over to fetch them...

Coming back only next Wednesday or Thursday...

The reason i didn't go....

My sis-in-law's mother is going...

And i don't like it....Haiz....

Holiday~~~

2008-08-13T16:55:00.004+08:00

My 3 weeks holiday have officially started...

Am i suppose to celebrate or something?

This is like the last holiday i'd be having as a student....

Hmmm...

But that isn't a bad thing though..

The worse thing is i'm losing my job...soon..

Since i heard the Sugar Baby counter at Bishan is closing down..

And possibly even the counter at Bugis is also closing down...

Expected though since the sales sucks...

Heard Bio-essence is taking over the area on the 20th of this month..

And yet.

My manager never even breath a word about it to us...

She could have left the schedule for the counters from the 20th empty...

But she still planned..

And worse i've got like 3 days at Bishan and that would mean i'd be losing.. $156 nett...

Duh.....

******************************

Completed the cross stitch meant for my baby..

Don't laugh..

I may appear rough but i'm still a girl after all.. :)

The problems that have arised before...

I shall forget about them..

At least for now...

And i hope i could..

Life has to carry on isn't it?

I'll just leave it to fate then..

What's meant to be,will be..

I'll just do what i should and can do..

Not do anything against my own conscience and that'd be good enough for me...

If fate wants to make a fool out of me..

Then so be it...

******************************

The end product....

Not very nice la..

But at least i can do it..

Hee hee...

I'm done with it and the whether he wants to throw it one side or hang it, it's up to him...

I just hope this piece wouldn't end up in the dust bin or worse..

In some other girl's house...

******************************

The supposed promise....

Promises are meant to be broken..

Aren't they?

******************************

Wonder if i'm meeting him today...

He's boooking out tonight and applied leave for Thursday and Friday..

Wonder if he'd be going out again tonight...

Wonder if he'd get drunk again..

Wonder if he'd be accompanying me on Thursday to the hospital..

I wonder...

******************************

Unsecured...

2008-08-08T23:47:00.002+08:00

As much as i try to go to sleep now..

I simply can't...

The reason?

Simple..

Him..

I fucking unsecure and i hate this stupid feeling i'm having now..

I doesn't help that i don't think he even realises how insecure his gf is...

And how crazy his gf actually is...

I think he'd freak out when he realises..

Yes yes..

I'm eccentric..

I know..

Everyone knows

How crazy can my thinking go?

I have no idea...

As much as i know...

My mind is full of nothing but rubbish....

Had been crapping the whole nite with Mr J...

Another Mr J...

Not my boy..

As my boy is sleeping..

I seriously felt like a bithch

Although i meant to be only joking around..

And Mr J doesn't mind..

So...Ya...

I asked myself...

When was the last time i laughed so wildly..

The answer...

When he and i were watching KungFu Panda alone...

And tht was before we got together...

I just want to be happy..

Is it tht hard?

All i ever wanted was a guy i could totally trust and rely on...

Doubt i'd be able to sleep well tonight...

Might as well then...

Shall continue watching my Californication...

Erase him off my mind...

At least for the next few hours till i feel sleepy...

Ciao...

FYP..GONE~~~

2008-08-06T14:50:00.003+08:00

I'm a goner...

My FYP was like SHIT...

I never really say much..

Thnks to someone who keep snatching words to say...

Thanks to Edwin for trying to find chances for me to speak..

Unfortunately..

I'm still too slow..

Have that dickless fucker got any brains or not..

Didn't he realise that he isn't being fair to the rest of us for keep snatching the words...

Even his best friend was pissed off with him..

Don't he even relise that one bad comment about one member could pull the whole grade down???

Grrr..

Fucking Pissed...

Met up wih Yuxin for dinner last night...

Ate PastaMania and walked around and chatted abit..

When was the last time we actually sat down for a chat...

I really miss the days when we are still in secondary school and we can sit around and make fun of each other and talk like thre's no tomorrow with the rest of the girls...

Haix...

But we have to move on..

Huiwen is going on with the uniform fitting and management round for silkair crew..

I hope she gets through..

Hopefully even though she has asthma...

The pay is really very..

Attractive..

But Yx sid i'm really not suitable for the job..

Oh well..

What she said is quite true..

There goes another choice...

Went to Phuture with Him and the girls...

Spent th whole night with him actually more than the girls..

Saw his friends..

One freaking drunk the other fucking high...

The guy vomited like shit and the girl..

Talking nonsense....

Stayed over at his house that night...

what we did in his room are not important... :P

woke up the next day around 12+ to go for our lunch..

then movie..

Money no enough 2...

Goldclass at Vivo..

Freaking ex...$30 per person

And his parents like paid for 5?...

Thaat means $150...

for a movie..

Is tht what the rich always do?

I wonder..

Had dinner at Ah Yat Seafood restaurant...

The bill... $400+...

KAO....

What can i say..

His dad spent money like water..

And the mount spent on that day alone is wht i can earn a month after slogging and sacrificing my weekends for work....

Duh...

If only i can have that kind of money..

Haix.....

Meeting him at his place at 6 for dinner tonight...

Shall catch some nap before leving for his house...

Ciaoz...

*i don wann be emo anymore..i wan to get out of the shell...move on w/o him if necessary... i need an excuse to get out...i need a breather..i just wan to be happy..is it that hard?

I'm a nut case...

2008-08-04T22:38:00.002+08:00

Going crazy again anytime soon..

My mind is like running wild again..

I don't get it..

Is he really that attractive?

Why do i always hear that this girl likes him and that girl likes him too..

Yes..yes..

I'm behaving like a vinegar vat again now..

But can't blame me..

I wasn't even attracted to him the first time i saw him..

I didn't even really fall for him when we started..

The feelings were developed gradually after being together..

Till now..

Though not very long.

Hope he doesn't get eaten up the coming friday...

With 2,3 girls who like him around him..

Duh..

Can't let my heart stay calm..

Yes yes..

They r cute..they are pretty..

then why choose the freaking-average looking me?

Just because i'm the odd one out among all ur girl-friends?

goodness...

r u hinting that i should go for plastic surgery then?

grrrr.....

I HATE PMS-ING!!!

2008-08-01T22:32:00.003+08:00

I broke down again..

In school..

Hadn't want to let it flow till darling gave me a hug..

And i cannot hold back anymore...

I just wanted to let everything out....

But i didn't cry like someone died though.

Broke down very silently...

Thanks darling for being there when i needed someone..

Boy's coming over for dinner tml since my niece and nephew are staying over...

For the sake of my niece he's coming to my house..

Do u like me or my niece?

Or are u thinking of having your own kid so much that u laid ur eyes on my sweetie..

Boy's mum booked to watch Money no Enough 2 on Sunday...

With her and Jolene and the 2 of us..

The good...

Free movie...

The bad...

Gooseberries...and my freaking bad mood...

Should be round 3+ on sunday..

I've got like most of my Sunday's not occupied this August...

Should i just put the rest of the sundys back to work?

I seriously need money..

I haven't paid bck my bro..

And with a boyfriend who sees money like water...

The more i should work hrder..

To save money for myself without him knowing..

I tired to..

But failed..

Can't bear to see him go hungry..

That's me..

Too soft hearted..

I should really hardened abit..

Girls should have their own private savings..

Guys nowadays may not even earn enough to support themselves so..

yea..

not trying to say all guys are like that..

But that's the real life situation now..

better to be safe than sorry..

Am stitching something for him...

But depending on my mood..

I might or might not give it to him.

He know's about this thing but i wouldn't show him the picture..

Depending on how he fares..

Make me angry..

*Snip..

There goes my hardwork and into the rubish bin..

Yes..

I am that guai lan...

That's like my nickname already since young....

haven't eaten anything since i left school after presenting...

never even stay for UT..

Stomach is growling but i simply don't feel like eating...

I HATE PMS-ING!!!

2008-08-01T13:03:00.002+08:00

Am PMS-ing all alone at the pantry now...

Feel that the class is too noisy and needed a quieter space...

Am so vexed and seriously need some accompany at this time..

He agreed to pick me up after school but now..

Haix...

I'm not trying to show attitude but i really have no mood to even type in "haha" into the msgs...

I'm sorry for that..

But shouldn't u even understand how much i needed someone by my side now..

I wun grumble if i'm single now...

But i'm like attached and my bf is free..

For his sake i left out 2 of my working days to be with him..

And hardly ever only this once...

I'm running off right after presentation and not even staying for my UT..

We had wanted to watch movie later but i said i had stomach cramps...

All u said was then u just go home after this and i can go home too..

Hello...i like can only meet u like how many times a week...

And won't u even spend some time trying to coax ur pms-ing gf to mke her feel better?

All i ever need is hug and a few comforting words and that's all..

don't tell me u can't do it..

or can't even think of it...

Tml my work ends at 6..

I tot i could have u for the rest of the night and sunday...

Only to have u telling me that u r going out after that...

Friends jio u, u MUST go out meh?

Just because they never pang seh u before doesn't mean u have to oblige to them every time..

What is this?

I never stopped u from going out with your friends..

I don even mind u going clubbing with them without me with all the temptations around u..

But EVERY WEEK...

This is like driving me nuts....

I just want a very simple relationship..

I dig out my time for u..

Y can't u do the same?

I'm feeling freakng down now...

and i hate this.

i wann go home and sleep till there's no tomorrow....

Can i?

E-M-O-T-I-O-N-S

2008-07-31T20:31:00.002+08:00

Bb's out again...

With KW...

It's her birthday and i simply refuse to join in...

The reason?

I've got school tml and i've got UT..

*Bullshit* whoever reading must be thinking "i got so guai meh"..

But i REALLY am that guai..

Tml Cold Chain predicted already D+

Pon somemore.Wa..

Don wan to risk repeating another year in school...

Just for one module..

Back to that...

Bb told me she tried to into a gal to him...

And is obviously up to no good...

Girls are getting scarier these days...

You'll never know what is up in their minds...

And no i'm not one of them..

I'm like half a year short to be considered a woman...

And adult to be exact..

Wonder how much temptations can my baby boy resist...

Wonder what time will he be home again tonight.....

Grrrr...

For the first time i cried on the spot last nite..

With him on the other side of the phone...

that is....

Had a shock didn't u boy?

Didn't realise i will actually cry...

Didn't realise i actually feel very bad about myself deep in my heart...

The butt of the problem..

My darling girl had a tiff with a boyfriend and all she wanted was a chat with me..

And i not even knowing he has a fever told him to go to bed..(because he said he's tired...)

Till his message came and told me to have a happy talking with my darlingand just to tell me he has a high fever and i don nid to reply..

It is my fault not to know he has fever...

But seriously...

how the hell do u tell if a person has fever when i can't even see that person?

And it's not that i don care...

Then he called but i didn't answer...called him back and we had nothing to say...

I'm a very bad expresser and i don't normally talk much (other than talking rubbish)

And u as my bf don even know...

thanks ah...

The silence with a few little tiffs...broke when i said we talk tml and i gg to bed..

sent him a msg saying good nite rest well without any emotions.

only to have his reply...i think i will rest well..i took 5 panadol..

how can anyone react normally when they see such a msg from ur other half?

Then..

i broke down..

Replied him that if that's his way of getting back at me for not showing concern and not being a good gf..

he succeeded...

He really did...

Called me only to find me crying...

Talked it out and evrything's back to normal...

I fucking need my pay can...

Shit no money again....Grrr......

Brr....

2008-07-30T01:59:00.004+08:00

No longer have to go to LTH~

Woohoo~~~

At least till the new semester starts.. :)

Updated my Facebook account just now...

Changed my status and added Bb's name..

Until this thing popped up..

I have to wait for confirmation for my relationship status?!

Very funy huh...

I was laughing like mad when i saw this screen pop out..

I seriously think we need to get on with my FYP Poster....

NOTHING IS DONE YET

SHIT!

And the presentation is on 6th August which is like 2 weeks later?

DOUBLE SHIT!

*Condolences to YP...

Sorry that she lost her dad...

And she has to support her sister alone...

I hope she can get over this period..

...

Low...

2008-07-26T23:58:00.002+08:00

Am like so so so tired...

Or rather restless these few days...

I'm like down with flu AND cough..AGAIN..

I like just recovered can...

Bb went off to club with his friends..

And yes..Without me again...

Really freaking poor..

And damn no mood to club already..

Could it be the younger hormones in me had died out already?

Or izit the people that i have to go with that the problem lies in...

Hmmm..

I wonder...

His friend is funny...

Introducing him to get into Real Estate..

Sounds wierd..

But beats having him to get involve in illegal stuff...

I should be happy... :)

That is if he decides to actually do things the proper way and move away from the dark side..

My usual naggings..

Or rather warnings that i'd leave him without saying anything if he goes back to his ah beng ways..

hopefully that'd be gone..

Told him i'm dead serious about this..

Hopefully he understands..

Being an ah beng with 20 over kids" as they call them sounds like a big deal..

And i told him..

U join them and have 20 kids below u and u'll lose ur gf at the same time..

Izit worth it? U gauge it yourself...

If he were to go bck to those ways...

I'll know how much i actually mean to him..

If that happens..

I'd probably become more bitchy den ever...

I guess...

Hopefully his friend would lead him to a good way where he could shine..

Or he might not walk this path for long..

But at least it gives him more exposure and experience and more $$..

Him earning $$ is so much better than him spending $$..

Hopefully my boy would grow up more with this experience.. :)

Bed Bed time..

Tml i've still got work...

And tt's after i finish my FYP report..

Zzzz....

Ciaoz..

Sharks fin...i like...

2008-07-21T22:17:00.003+08:00

Just came back from Bb's house after dinner...

Had steamboat...

The soup was super sweet...

And super not cheap...

Though they had the steamboat at home..

They had these HUGE prawns..

which were totally impossible to fit into my mouth in a whole..

And the soup..

Ikan billis..

With SHARKS FIN...

Woots...

Buay pai sia..

I zhuan dao..

But feel guilty at the same time since my parents only had a few dumplings while i enjoyed my dinner...

Had his mum to drive me home..

Feel so bad can..

That goondo boy of mine.

Me and his mum tot he knew the way..

We ended up making one big detour..

Went through CTE to the CIty..

Den from there go CTE den exit bradell again..

Kana sai..

One big round can..

His ex gf..

Or rather his sister..

Miss SM...

Kena bastard by her fiance..

He left her for his ex gf..

What a bastard..

Could be my wild thoughts running again..

Could this next happen to me?

As much as i try to trust him more...

But no one knows what would happen..

I won't even blame them now if they still have feelings for each other..

Matters of the heart = complicated...

Other girl friends of him i'd still trust..

But only her..

Don't know why..

I feel wierd..

Oh dear..

Getting paranoid again..

Anyway..

Just hope she could get hold of herself...

Hope she wouldn't kill herself because of a bastard..

Which is seriously not worth at all...

...

To Angelynn.....

2008-07-17T22:55:00.002+08:00

I'd better get on with this before Angel starts giving me the ":(" face too much...
Haha~
So here it goes......
A. List seven quirks/habits/facts about you.
B. Tag seven people to do the same.
C. Do not tag the person that tagged you or say that you tag "whoever wants to do it".

1. Fact - I love to hug my bolster to sleep more than hugging my boy boy...(Y? Cox my bolster doesn't on v-tec like what he does..Oops...)
2. Fact - I'm atticted to my boy boy's perfume... (er...i just realised it.. :P)
3. Habit - I like to laze on the bed for a very long time after i wake up...
4. Habit - I'd keep muching on tidbits while watchng TV..
5. Fact - I hate school...(who does anyway?)
6. Fact - I love to blast music and sway to the beats.but i can't dance..(contradicting huh..)
7. Habit - Use my concealer before leaving the house...( no choice la..my stupid pimples are too visible...)

People i'm gonna tag.....
Yin Min..
Sebas
Xiao Hui
Winnie
Qiaoying
Kat
Yasmin

I guess.... :P

So gonna go to bed..
Skipped school again today....
:P
Boy coming over for diner tml..
After his doc appt and taking his bath.. :P
Pick me up from school...
And my little monsters are coming over.. :)
I'm so sorry for making my sweetie wait for 2 days and i have no time to accompany her..
Sorry sweetie....i promise i'll be there to play with u tml...
Hurts me to see her cry..
I see her as if my own daughter..
:)
I dono why
and no..
I'm not wanting to be a mother so eagerly..
At least not as eager as boy who wants to be a dad so soon..
Wait 4 more years la huh boy..
Ciao....

...

2008-07-13T22:17:00.002+08:00

Have been like staying out late these few days..

Freaking tired..

Freaking poor...

Freaking tak boleh tahan....

Went to MOS yesterday..

And it's...

BORING..

Den headed to NANA to find his cousin..

Sawadeekup..

Very thailand can..

10.08.08

1st month...

Went to Ps...

Made a pair of couple ring from couple lab...

Den dinner at Ichiban..

Den watched Zohan...

Frekaing funny...

Den went down to boat quay to find his friends..

Or rather his girl-friends..

And home..

Nothing special and i kind of expected it..

2 hours 5 minutes to 1.....

2008-07-09T21:41:00.002+08:00

Haven't been listening to chinese songs for some time already...

Very randomly..

I started listening to the older songs...

Song by song i scroll down and listen..

Looking at the lyrics..

Humming the tunes...

I find myself recollecting the past....

My failed relationship experiences..

The happy times and the sad times..

The very first time i broke down in front of everyone...

The very first time i fell for someone so deeply..

So deep that it still hurts somewhere inside me...

Listening to the song..

I broke down again..

Jay...回到过去

David Tao...普通朋友

Guess i'm pretty prone to break downs recently...

To most people i should be happily celebrating my first month tml..

Yes..Only first month..

Though it seems like it'd been years...

Maybe i've been hurt too many times...

So many times that i find myself no longer able to trust someone as much as i use to..

I'm paranoid...

I'm pretty sure about that now...

*Definition of paranoid: Exhibiting or characterized by extreme and irrational fear or distrust of others

In some other words, i'm just crazy...

Boy..

I'm no superglue and i'm not the typical possessive type of gf..

Don't assume that i'd get angry over the slightest matter...

Though i do at times..

But they all come to the same thing..

I don't mind u clubbing or pubbing without me..

Like what u do mind...though u said u're okay with it..

I can no longer totally trust some one..

And that's a fact i find it very hard to change as much as i wish to get rid of...

I hope that amount of trust placed on you wouldn't be betrayed..

Just like what some others did..

I guess i'd really let go if such thing were to happen...

Not trying to be emo..

Just don't know what's got into me recently..

Seriously...

I really don't know...

I guess u might have told some others about us...

And that's why i heard u say something about everyone thinks i'm wierd these days..

I have to say...

I'm not being just being wierd these days..

I have ALWAYS been a wierdo..

As much as i hate to be labeled as one..

I accepted it..

I am what i am..

hopefully nothing goes wrong tml...

2 hours 5 minutes to 1 month.....

Horoscopes...Again...How true can they be....

2008-07-09T11:39:00.003+08:00

SCORPIO - THE VIRGIN (10/23-11/21) Loves being in long relationships. Likes to give a good fight for what they want. Extremely outgoing. Loves to help people in times of need. Best kisser. Good personality. Stubborn. A caring person.

TAURUS - THE BAD BOY OR GIRL (4/20-5/20) Very high appeal. Love is one of a kind. Very romantic. Most caring person you will ever meet! Entirely creative. Extremely random and proud of it. Freak. Spontaneous. Great at telling Stories. Not a Fighter, But will Knock your lights out if it comes down to it. Someone you should hold on to.

GEMINI--HARD TO LOVE (5/21-6/21) Outgoing. Lovable. Spontaneous. Not one to mess with. Funny. Excellent kisser. EXTREMELY adorable. Good personalities. Loves relationships. Addictive. Loud.

CANCER - HARD TO CATCH THEIR HEART (6/22-7/22) Trustworthy. Attractive. Great kisser. One of a kind. Loves being In long- term relationships, if you can actually get them to stick around. Extremely energetic. Unpredictable. Will exceed your expectations. Normally not a Fighter, but will if neccessary. Someone loves them right now, they jut dont know it.

LIBRA - THE PIMP (9/23-10/22) Caring and kind. Smart. Center of attention. High appeal. Has the last word. Good to find, hard to keep. Fun to be around. Extremely weird but in a good way. Good Sense of Humor. Thoughtful. Always gets what he or she wants. Loves to joke. Very popular. Silly, fun and sweet.

PISCES - THE SEX ADDICT (2/19-3/20) EXTREMELY adorable. Intelligent. Loves to joke. Very Good sense of humor. Energetic. Predict future. BEST kisser. Always get what they want. Very Attractive. Easy going. RARE Find. GOOD when found. Loves being in long relationship. Talkative. Romantic. Caring. NOT one to mess with.

LEO - THE SEX MANIAC (7/23-8/22) Very talkative. Nice to everyone they meet. Their Love is one of a kind. Silly, Fun and SEXY. Have own unique appeal. Irresistible. Most caring person you'll ever meet! however not the kind of person you wanna mess with...they will kick your ass... u might end up crying...

ARIES - THE PLAYER (3/21-4/19) Nice. Love is one of a kind. Great listeners Very Good in bed... Lover not a fighter, but will still knock you out. Trustworthy. Always happy. Loud. Talkative. Outgoing VERY FORGIVING. Loves to make out. Has a beautiful smile. Generous. Strong. THE MOST IRRESISTIBLE.

VIRGO - THE BEST SEXUAL PARTNER (8/23-9/22) Love to bust. Nice. Sassy. Intelligent. EXTREMELY SEXY. Predict future. Loves being in long relationships. Has lots of friends. Great talker. Always gets what he or she wants. Also not a fighter, but if they have to, they will also knock the lights out of you if it comes down to it.Cool. Loves to own Geminis' in sports. Extremely fun. Loves to joke. Smart.

CAPRICORN - THE SEXY ONE (12/22-1/19) Dominant in relationships. Someone loves them right now. Always Wants the last word.Rare to find. Caring. Smart. Sweet. Loud. Loyal. Beautiful. Goofy. Easy to talk to. Everything you ever wanted. Easy to please.Loves to smile.Beautiful laugh.Patient.Amazing in the you know where..!!! Bit of naughty.The one and only.

Me......AQUARIUS - THE ONE U CAN'T TOUCH (1/20-2/18) Great talker. Attractive and passionate. Laid back. Knows how to Have fun. Is really good at almost anything. Great kisser. Unpredictable. Outgoing. Down to earth. Attractive. Loud. Talkative. Not one to mess with. Rare to find. Good when found.

I'm not a great talker.....Neither attractive nor passionate....Laid back is pretty true...Am i great kisser???Very unpredictable....Duh....

One of those stupid chin letters where they sy u'd have how many years of bad luck when not reposted......Whatever...

Am like slacking at LTH...

3 of us playing Beat Bubbles trying to break the record at level 19...And i kena gme over at level 16.... Pretty cute game....

http://flash.ijji.com/game.nhn?id=fspmusic

Happy Birthday Ah min!!!

2008-07-09T00:14:00.004+08:00

Happy 20th Birthday to my dear lover~

ZHANG YIN MIN!!!!

Hope she had a happy birthday today..

Though it's not some kind of a celebration..

A simple affair between her, me and ah tong...

At PartyWorld...

My as usual K-ing khakis..

Went home by bus and changed to mrt home..

On the way while walking home..

2 very KAM GONG...

And i mean VERY...

IDIOTS...

Cycling on the pavement...

"SPEEDING"somemore..

Couldn't see them since they came from the corner..

The first one not so bad..

Still can stop in time..

But the 2nd one..

Kana sai..

Never see your friend got stop izit...

Ride so fast somemore..

And i kena hit at the stomach..

Heng i no baby..

Got baby sure miscarriage..

But that's not the main thng..

The main thing i walk faster than the 2 auntie and uncle..

Imagine one or both of them kena hit how..

These 2 brainless idiots..

Pavement for what de?

Walking de right?

What the hell are their bikes doing at the PAVEMENT???

Heng my mood not bad...

If not my vulgarities sure all come out...

I have to work..

I HAVE TO WORK...

I'm so so so broke....

Grrr......

I haven't changed a single bit..

U don't know me long enough to realise the other side of me which you are seeing now..

It's just my fault to not explain things and expect you to understand...

But it's simply just the typical me to handle things this way...

I'm alright with you having good gal pals..

Or even meeting your past memories...

But purposely meeting up for dinner..

and only the 3 of us..

no way..

hope u'd understand how i feel..

not trying to be stubborn but the feeling was...

bad..

hope u'd enjoy the night with her...

without me and him by ur sides..

As much as i don't feel secured..

this is the only way i could handle..

i'm sorry for not wanting to spell out things..

which i feel is totally unnecessry...

This is just me..

Take it or leave it...

If you're leaving...

Do it fast..

I want no regrets...

The fear within me hasn't subsided..

In fact it's still growing..

Sometimes it's not about just one party doing the saying..

Once the other made some actions...

Some promises made could then be broken...

There's no such thing as irreconcilable love..

anything can happen..

I don't wish for that to not happen..

There's nothing i could do to stop it if it really happens...

i just hope for the best outcome..

Whatever it is..

I'd accept it..

I just hope heaven wouldn't make a fool out of me again...

Good night...

Duh...

2008-07-07T23:32:00.002+08:00

Feeling so fucked up now...

Am having a freaking gastric pain with no one by my side..

Boy had already left my home to go bck to camp..

Guess he should be snoring already by now...

Cannot call him since he's in camp and confirm wouldn't be able to come out..

Parents not at home either...

I hate this feeling....

Can i just vomit everything out...

Grrr...

Ah min's birthday tml..

Meeting her and ah tong go sing K after school..

Hope she'd have a heppy 20th birthday~ :)

Heck care my gastric now..

Hopefully i cld get some sleep..

It'd be a long day tml.....

CIAOZ...

Randomness....

2008-07-07T15:43:00.003+08:00

For some reason i dono why...

I just feel like crying last night...

Went into the room around 8+ with the lights closed..

Armed with my phone and ear piece...

Blast my music and the tears keep flowing...

Maybe too many things have been cramped up in my heart and am just trying to find a way to release them...

Told him and he's like what the fuck...

Saying why i didn't tell him last night..

Please la..

I need my space....

Personality Test

2008-07-03T19:36:00.001+08:00

Dreamy Idealists are very cautious and therefore often appear shy and reserved to others. They share their rich emotional life and their passionate convictions with very few people. But one would be very much mistaken to judge them to be cool and reserved. They have a pronounced inner system of values and clear, honourable principles for which they are willing to sacrifice a great deal. Joan of Arc or Sir Galahad would have been good examples of this personality type. Dreamy Idealists are always at great pains to improve the world. They can be very considerate towards others and do a lot to support them and stand up for them. They are interested in their fellow beings, attentive and generous towards them. Once their enthusiasm for an issue or person is aroused, they can become tireless fighters.For Dreamy Idealists, practical things are not really so important. They only busy themselves with mundane everyday demands when absolutely necessary. They tend to live according to the motto “the genius controls the chaos” - which is normally the case so that they often have a very successful academic career. They are less interested in details; they prefer to look at something as a whole. This means that they still have a good overview even when things start to become hectic. However, as a result, it can occasionally happen that Dreamy Idealists overlook something important. As they are very peace-loving, they tend not to openly show their dissatisfaction or annoyance but to bottle it up. Assertiveness is not one of their strong points; they hate conflicts and competition. Dreamy Idealists prefer to motivate others with their amicable and enthusiastic nature. Whoever has them as superior will never have to complain about not being given enough praise.As at work, Dreamy Idealists are helpful and loyal friends and partners, persons of integrity. Obligations are absolutely sacred to them. The feelings of others are important to them and they love making other people happy. They are satisfied with just a small circle of friends; their need for social contact is not very marked as they also need a lot of time to themselves. Superfluous small talk is not their thing. If one wishes to be friends with them or have a relationship with them, one would have to share their world of thought and be willing to participate in profound discussions. If you manage that you will be rewarded with an exceptionally intensive, rich partnership. Due to their high demands on themselves and others, this personality type tends however to sometimes overload the relationship with romantic and idealistic ideas to such an extent that the partner feels overtaxed or inferior. Dreamy Idealists do not fall in love head over heels but when they do fall in love they want this to be a great, eternal love.

Adjectives which describe your type:

introverted, theoretical, emotional, spontaneous, idealistic, dreamy, effusive, pleasant, reserved, friendly, passionate, loyal, perfectionist, helpful, creative, composed, curious, obstinate, with integrity, willing to make sacrifices, romantic, cautious, shy, peace-loving, vulnerable, sensitive, communicative, imaginative

These subjects could interest you:

literature, philosophy, psychology, music, art (museums), writing, drawing/painting, astrology, spiritual things, meditation, handicrafts, writing, voluntary work

Oh my god...Am i that boring???

3rd July 2008

2008-07-03T18:45:00.002+08:00

Everything's alright now...

I guess..

Emo-ed on wednesday...

Not wanting to tell him what exctly happended to me..

Just needed some time alone without anyone by my side...

Not that there's no one to be with me..

Just that i wanted to be left alone that's all..

Walked all the way from Ang Mo Kio back home..

Took like 45 mins..

Some people might think i'm crazy..

Why would some one want to walk for 45 mins when the bus from AMK to home takes only 15?

Yes..

I'm crazy..

Wasn't in the right mind...

My dad was at home and i needed a place to calm myself down and kinda sort out my thinking..

Which i never did...

Mind was blank in that 45 mins till my boy called..

Made him worried..

Made him frustrated...

I'm sorry...

But everything's okay now...

For now...

Been only together for less than a month but it seems like we've been together for more than a year..

My dad asked me...

Are you getting serious with that boy...

My answer to him..."Hee hee"..

A smile and nothing else..

My answer to myself?

I don't know..

Still too early to say anything..

He might just decide i'm not the one he wants to be with afterall and leave me for another..

Which i won't be surprised..

I sound as if i'm suffering from paranoia...

And i'm wondering too...

Am i paranoid or did i just decide to give up on life...

Not by committing suicide of course..

But looked at the other side of life..negatively...

Like i always did...

As much as i try to change...

I still remain the same..

Tong told me the other day that some things happened to Yoke Pian....

It's a turning point for her..

One action might just change her whole fate..

Her mum passed away a couple of years ago..

Leaving behind her sister and also her dad...

Recently for some reason..

Her dad landed in hospitl and is in a coma

And her sis came out of hospital recently too..

She might have to stop school to support the family..

I wonder how could heaven be so cruel to her?

And i wonder what could i do to help her...

Stopping school for her is really a waste since she's graduating in just another few months..

But if she continued, where will she find money to pay for her fees..

And what'd happen to her family.

I hope her dad pulls through and everything would turn out fine for her...

As compared to her..i like so much luckier with my whole family with me..

...

My dad passed me 2 books...

2 COOK books to be specific...

Why'd he buy that for me?

He wanted me to learn to cook t least some simple dishes...

His reason?

He doesn't want others to say that how can i not know how to cook when both my parents and my brother can cook...

The APPARENT reason...

He's afraid i can't even cook a decent meal for my future family..

Of course i can'tlet him know that i did cook once when my boy stayed over when they weren't around...

Simple porridge with chicken...

Yes...i CAN cook...

At least it's edible...

Hee hee...

7 days to first month.....

It's all my fault....

2008-06-30T21:26:00.004+08:00

I sometimes wonder am i suitable to get into a relationship....

I'm a bad girlfriend and i know it..

But i simply don't know how to change for the better...

Maybe i should consider just staying single for the rest of my life..

Not even 1 month yet and i realise we can hang on to the phone not saying one word...

I've got bad feelings now..

I really don't want to PMS and he has to bear with it..

I know he's unhappy and yet i could do nothing...

He insisted in accompanying me on the phone everyday..

Even if he's tired or not feeling well..

I wonder if it's because we've just started not long ago or he's still young...

Or maybe it's my problem...

Maybe he's been too nice and i'm unappreciative...

I think i might have preferred my freedom more than a company...

wonder if i could bear to let him go at this point of time..

Don't wish to hurt him..

Maybe i shouldn't have even agreed in the first place...

It's all my fault.....

PISSED!

2008-06-27T11:04:00.002+08:00

FUCKING PISSED!!!

Poof...

WHY???

Shall start with the story...

25th June 2008..

Supposedlyshould be at LTH for FYP...

BUT got a fever and can't get out of bed...

6am in the morning...

Very blur but still in some right mind to bother to sms my BELOVED team leader that i'm down with fever and can't make it..

TRied waiting a while..

No Reply...

Tak Boleh Tahan..

Doze off...

With all those buzzing from my phone

but wasn't on purpose that i didn't reply or pick up..

I didn't even reply my boyfriend duh...

Woke up and saw this message from the team leader...

"I want a detailed explanation from all of you tomorrow regarding your absence today and why you did not bother to inform me so we meet before lunch"

Duh....

How could you say i did not inform you when i actually did early in the morning at 6?

then..

"Ok i never say the message but you should also inform the rest sebas woke up late and weishen when there alone"

Oi...WTF??

U r the team leader leh..

Of course i inform u l...

Waste my sms to tell everyone..

You never even inform ALL of us that you weren't going either??

"Dun do that again next time if i don't reply u should go there or t least inform the rest dun thinktat i dun reply mens u dun need to go it dun work tt way"

I was fuming mad by the time i saw this

And imagine i'm running a fever??!!

I bet my temperature went up to 40 degree celcius..

I replied...

How do u expect me to go when i cannot even get down my bed? If i could i wouldn't have even sent that sms. And i was not even in the right mind to think of smsing the rest...In that case i am sorry for not informing the rest. But don't you owe me an apology for sayig i did not inform u when i actually did?

"Tat's my mistake so next time inform the rest also"

WTF..

I bowed down to say sorry but he did not...

FARK...

Call me petty..

Watever..

I swallow my pride so much already..

There's a limit to everything...

Went for the meeting just now..

I wasn't at fault so he cannot scold me..

Now every thursday have to report what time we went and what time we left on Wednesday...

argh...

whatever la..

case closed...

ARGH...

2008-06-23T20:10:00.002+08:00

I wan my pay NOW!!!!

Kao...when was the last time i'm so desperately poor???

Thanks to the company for giving out my paycheque so late...

Geez..

Must control control control..

Muz control not only mine but his finances too..

No more cab for u..

No more spending blindly..for both of us..

Asking to save only $50 a month for him isn't too much right..

But i doubt $450 would be enough for a spendthrift like him..

I have to spend all my weekends working just to get enough money..

In fact it ain't enough..

Maybe i should realy consider getting another job for the weekdays..

Even if it's just a few hours it'd be enough i guess...

I wan to save money..

But living life this way isn't gonna help...

Felt so much better after msging that guy and letting him know i'm attached..

Don't know if i did hurt him nd he voided me or not..

From what he told me it's because his sms was over the limit that's y he didn't contact me..

Which i think i bullshit..

But whatever it is...

Not important anymore..

Most important thing is i've gotten it off my chest and i feel so much better~

Now all i have to do is to explain to him...

Explain explain explain...

And hell did i get a shock this morning...

As usual didn't go to school...

But this time i'm really dead tired..

I can't even recall when was the last time i really had enough sleep...

I slept around 10 plus last night and till 11 plus today...

Ran out of the house before my dad comes home and relise i skipped school again...

Before that when i woke up i saw his buddy's msg...

where on earth did that guy get my number from..

We met like only once and nearly picked a fight..(playfully that is)

And after that i haven't seen him...

Wonder what this guy is up to...

hmmm..

heck la..

Tomorrow going to school(confirm kena scolding by the girls..)

Shall present first and run off to meet my boy for his doctor appointment...

Haix....

How i wish he couldjust be a good soldier....

18th june 2008...

2008-06-18T01:34:00.002+08:00

And i haven't got my pay yet!

I'm like so freaking broke can..

And same goes to my boy..Two poor souls..Anyone has any lobang for fast cash?

Maybe i could allow him to get involve in some a-little-against-principles activities..

Then perhaps our lives could be better..

I actually don't even mind if he "drives" his family car around to save on trnsport..

But at the speed he goes....Er...

Scary...

People date and i date...But why do i always face problems..

He's been very nice to me till now..Or rather too nice..

So nice till i feel uneasy at times..Could have been the fact that i'm older..I feel more like his mother than his girlfriend...

Taking care of his stomach....Making sure he's like not hungry..

Cooking him a meal before he even got out from bed...

Like yesterday....

Wasn't very appetising but at least the food was edible...

Washing his boxers for him...

Did things like we were already married rather than we're only dating...

And this point was picked out by him first..

His tries to pamper me makes me feel awkward..

Don't call me crazy..

I'm so used to being alone without all those sweet-nothings and pamperings from ex-boyfriends that i totally forgot such things exist...

What's happen in future remains unknown...

He might be the one..or might not be,...

No one knows..

I just hope he'd chnge for the better and i'd be happy already..

See.

I'm sounding even more like mother now...

FYP FYP FYP....

Sian...

Gott wake up at 6..which is like around 4 hours later...

Gotta go to bed before i really cannot wake up at all later....

CIAOZ..

Day 6.....

2008-06-16T00:42:00.004+08:00

Must i say anymore?

Introducing..

My current boy....

OOPS?!